Rating: PG-13

Category: AU, angstyfic, M/L

Summary: Max travels back from the future, and Liz must save the world again.

Spoilers: "The End of the World"

Disclaimer: I don’t own them *sniffle* They’d be a lot happier if I did…

Author’s Notes: This is therapy fic for "The End of the World"…what else? Also, assume when Congresswoman Widdicker told Isabel she betrayed Max, she was either lying or mistaken. Just trust me on this one. None of the second season episodes after "EotW" apply...

*

"Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice; it is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." —William Jennings Bryant

Prologue

2010: 10 minutes before the fall

"Max, you have to do it now!" Liz exclaimed, pushing him toward the granolith. The entire chamber was humming with it’s power, nearly pulsing with the coming darkness. He paused, waited, turned back to look at her, to touch her arm gently.

"Are you sure?" he asked again. Again and again. Her eyes were adamant.

"It can’t get worse," she reminded him, tensing beneath the feel of his hand on her leather-clad arm.

"But it could be more painful," he pointed out.

"No, it couldn’t," she informed him, then looked up quickly as the structure shook. "Go!" He nodded and placed the time-crystal into the proper slot.

"Goodbye Liz," he whispered. She was silent, and after a moment he stepped into the granalith and appeared within it, trapped inside the power, part of it.

"So this is what it was like," Liz whispered to herself, as she looked up and met his eyes. "Maybe history is really unchangeable." His hand reached out to her and she bit her lip and stepped forward, reaching her own up to his. And then he was gone. Tears appeared quickly in Liz’s eyes. No more pretending now. No more lying. He was gone, back to the past, to change it. Again.

It had to be changeable. He had to make it better this time.

The last time, he’d only made it worse.

Part One

2006: Roswell, New Mexico

"Kill me now," Liz begged. Her best friend Maria rolled her eyes and handed Liz a tray of food.

"That’s supposed to be my line," Maria retorted. "Besides, you’re the one in college. Can’t you get a better job?"

"Maria, I have a better job. I’m only doing this as a favor to you," Liz reminded her.

"Oh right. Better get working then," Maria replied cheerfully, turning back to the kitchen. Liz glared at her back for a moment, then turned and walked over to the Table of Doom—where the middleaged men were making growling noises at her as she served them their burgers. She knew there was a reason she was getting a masters degree…so she wouldn’t have to put up with this. She forced a smile at them before turning and stalking off to the next table. The front bell rang, and she glanced up, involuntarily freezing as Max walked in the front door, hand-in-hand with Tess. His girlfriend. The one that actually mattered to the world. Max was saying something to Tess, and as they stepped inside he glanced around…straight at Liz. She looked quickly back to her customers, setting down their sundaes and whisking away their old dishes. As she hurried back to the kitchen she could feel his eyes on her…or maybe that was just wishful thinking. Or worried thinking…?

When it came to Max, things got very confusing.

"Earth to Liz?" Maria said, waving a hand in front of her face. Liz started, nearly dropping her dirty dishes. "Let me guess, Max is here."

"What does that have to do with anything?" Liz asked defensively, walking past Maria to scrape the dishes off before dropping them in the sink to be washed.

"Okay, Liz, I’m your best friend. I can tell when you’re madly in love with someone. That’s my job. What I don’t get is why you screwed yourself over. Literally and figuratively."

Liz whirled around, glaring at her ‘best friend.’ "Look Maria, my decisions are my decisions. It’s been six years. I am over it. I suggest you get over it too. Now, obviously you have plenty of time on your hands. I don’t think I’m needed here." Fuming, she stormed past Maria and the astonished cook—Michael quit years before—out of the kitchen, and into the back locker room.

Where Max and Tess were sitting, talking to Serena. Liz stopped short.

"Hi," Serena said, trying to smooth over the palpable tension in the room. Tess was sitting on the couch, next to Serena, and Max sat on the arm, one hand on Tess’s shoulder, the other held in hers. They looked…very couple-y.

"Hi," Liz said. Tess smiled at her, obvious working at sincere. Max nodded.

Behind her, Maria entered, speaking rapidly. "Liz, I’m sorry but I just don’t get why you—" She cut off abruptly, realizing they had all turned to watch her. "Hi."

"Now that we’ve all greeted each other…" Serena remarked, obviously trying to change the subject.

"I’m going," Liz reported, walking quickly to the stairs. Max followed her progress with his eyes, then quickly looked away. Tess bit her lip, glancing apologetically at Serena, who looked genuinely distressed. Maria just looked as if she wanted to smack them all. Without a backward glance, Liz hurried up the stairs, glad she still kept some clothes at her parents’ house. This way she could climb down from her old balcony and she wouldn’t have to face them again. Serena and Tess would undoubtedly insist that she stay and get in on the latest battle plans. Which she would do, she really would but…it was just too awkward, with Max there. Every time he looked at her, she worried that it hadn’t worked. And every time he didn’t…well, that had it’s own downfalls from the point of view of Liz’s heart.

She just wanted to go home and be pathetically lonely all by herself. She was getting good at that.

*

"Is Liz okay?" Max asked quietly, glancing from Maria over to Tess, who was chatting animatedly with Serena and Michael. Maria followed his glance sourly.

"Is Liz ever okay? I swear, she’s my best friend, but I don’t understand her. Half the time she’s cheerful planning-her-future-girl, and then she gets all broody and plays Sarah McLachlan for like hours at a time. Not that you need to hear any of this. Why are you asking anyway?"

Max looked slightly taken aback. "She’s my friend," he replied. Maria’s eyebrows shot up.

"Right. Because you two have been on such friendly terms for the last six years while you didn’t talk to each other!"

"Hey, you’re one to talk," Max pointed out, nodding to Michael. Maria glared at him.

"I have moved on, thank you very much. And I’ve found that Michael has nothing interesting to say," she snapped. A smile tugged at the corners of Max’s mouth and Maria smacked his arm. Tess turned around just in time to see as she called Max over with a grin.

"What are you doing abusing my boyfriend?" Tess demanded.

"Oh, he deserved it," Maria replied, unrepentant. Max walked over, pausing behind the couch and putting his hands on Tess’s shoulders.

"We were discussing the granolith," Tess told him. Max stiffened slightly. He disliked discussing the power source—mostly because he completely disagreed with everyone else as to how it should be used. Including Tess.

"What did you decide?" Max asked, trying to keep his voice light.

"We need to learn how to use it," Michael insisted. "We need those information cards. We have to raid the Skins."

"We’ve gone over this before," Max replied. "It’s too dangerous. It’s not worth it…we can figure it out ourselves."

"Max, not to disagree but…the granolith is far beyond any human knowledge. And that includes all of you. Alien you may be, but not in schooling. I don’t think you can ‘figure it out’," Serena put in.

"No raid," Max said firmly. Tess moved away from his hands, twisting to look up at him with flashing eyes.

"Max, you’re being stupid about this. We can get in and out with no one the wiser. We need that information."

"No," he repeated. "We need you. And you, Michael. And Isabel. And everyone else. We’re more important than information cards. We don’t even know what they say!"

"We know that you’re never going to listen to what any of us have to say," Michael replied, standing up. "Ever." He stalked out of the room and Maria crossed her arms, stubbornly refusing to follow. Serena sighed.

"I guess I’ll go be peacemaker," she volunteered, getting up and following him. Max stared after them broodingly. What did they want from him? To order them into stupid missions that would get them killed? It wasn’t like he didn’t understand…he knew all too well the need to do something…but the point was not to give in to that. Give in to it and they were all dead. Maria shrugged when he looked to her.

"I have to go work," she excused herself, and left Max and Tess alone. He looked to his girlfriend, hoping for some support…anything. But her grey eyes were dark.

"You’re wrong Max. We need the granolith’s power. And we should be doing whatever is possible to get it." Before he could reply, or try to make amends, she stood up and stalked off as well. Max was left alone, like always. Alone. And it didn’t matter if he was right. Only that he didn’t think the way they did.

*

The phone was ringing. Liz groaned and flopped over on her bed, reaching for it with one hand while securing her bookmark with the other.

"Hello?"

"Hey Liz, it’s Serena," her roomate replied, as if Liz wouldn’t recognize her voice. "How you doing?"

"Fine. Studying. You guys going to be home soon?" Liz inquired, not entirely sure if she was looking forward to that or not. Having roomates certainly kept her from spending all her time being depressed, but at the same time…sometimes privacy was a good thing. There was hesitation on the other side of the line.

"Actually, we were going to go to that new club, the one over on Washington? Do you want to come?" From the tone of Serena’s voice, Liz could easily assume that Tess and Max were going to be there.

"No thanks. I think I’ll get to bed early."

"Okay, if you’re sure…"

"I’m fine. Have fun."

"We’ll try. Goodnight."

"Night." Liz hung up the phone and pulled herself into a sitting position, looking around her tiny room. She should do something. She should…do what? There was nothing to do. She thought for about a second about getting dressed up and going to meet the gang anyway, but decided against it. Maybe she’d have some ice cream…

Liz was on her way to the kitchen when the living room was suddenly full of light…familiar light. She blinked, and shielded her eyes, something inside her screaming that it was happening again. Not again.

But silent protests obviously didn’t do any good, because when Liz opened her eyes, he was there, clad in leather, with long hair and scratched arms. Staring at her with hungry dark eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Liz asked in a terrified whisper. "It worked. I know it worked…you were gone. Why are you back? Why are you back?"

"Back?" Max asked, looking startled. "Liz, you’re not going to believe this but…I’m from the future. 2010. And I’m not going to hurt you."

"Sure about that last one?" Liz asked bitterly, then blinked. "2010…? But you…you were from 2014…you…"

"What do you mean?" Future Max asked, looking just as confused as Liz was feeling. Now that she really looked at him, she realized he wasn’t the same as the last time. There was no grey in his hair. He looked…younger. A little.

"You’re here for another reason?" Liz asked, her voice rising in pitch as fear set in. What could he ask of her this time? What else could she possibly give up? Sudden understanding dawned in his dark eyes.

"I came back before. My future self came back…in another future."

"Yes," she whispered.

"That’s why you thought of this. It was you…your future self…that suggested we try this. You insisted we could find a way. You were right. Because you already knew."

"What happened?" Liz asked softly, unable to stand there and listen to him and not now. "What do you want from me?"

Max looked her straight in the eyes and she looked straight back. It had been a long time since the Max of her day had done that…or since she’d had the courage to return such a look.

"I don’t know what you did before. But now I…I need you to make me fall in love with you again."

Part Two

"Stay away from me," Liz hissed, stumbling backwards, searching for some kind of weapon, never taking her eyes off him. The man who wasn’t Max. Who couldn’t be Max. Not asking that…

He winced. "I’m sorry you dislike the idea so much," he said carefully, "but it’s the only way."

"You’re not Max," Liz insisted, turning around the kitchen counter and opening a door, pulling out a knife. He raised his eyebrows at the weapon, knowing as she did that she probably couldn’t hurt him with it. She glared in reply.

"I am Max. What can I do to prove it to you? I came tonight because Maria and Serena are out at that new dance club, with me, Tess, Michael and Isabel. In about a minute Maria is going to call you to apologize for a fight you had earlier—I don’t know what it was about, but she kept worrying about you so Tess loaned her her cell phone. That is, she will loan it to her…"

"Why do you always do that? Like Skins couldn’t find out details!" Liz exclaimed.

"I’m not a Skin. Why can’t you believe me?"

"Because if I do what you ask me to, I will be destroying the world," Liz whispered, lowering the knife to the counter. Max froze, eyes dark.

"I don’t understand…"

"The last time you came back, was the night you sang to me below my balcony," Liz murmured. "You and I were supposed to…" She cut off abruptly and took a deep breath. "Anyway, we were going to be together. In a relationship. But doing that…drove Tess away. And she was needed. And I was not. So the world ended because of me."

She dared a look upwards, and saw that Max had an indescribable expression on his face. "It was a lie," he whispered.

"Everything."

"So that Tess wouldn’t leave." She frowned, not understanding, but nodded.

"And it worked. You’re with Tess now."

"And in five days she is going to betray us to the Skins," Max replied, and Liz felt her whole world collapse. Again.

*

"Tell me it isn’t true," Liz pleaded when she’d regained control of her facilities. She was sitting in a chair, Max kneeling at her feet, her hands secured in his, warm and comforting. And real. It wasn’t a dream. Or a nightmare. Or a dream. He didn’t say anything. She looked away, upwards, then back down at him. "Why? How? She’s not…she loves you…"

"That’s why," Max replied. "She thinks we need the Skin information about the granolith in order to defeat them. So she makes a deal with them, thinking that she can control it. She plans to get the information and therefore access the power of the granolith, and thinks once that’s happened whatever she told them wouldn’t help them anyway. But she was wrong…will be wrong. She betrays us for love of me, and because of that they win. And the world ends."

"But if you drive her away, if you and I…then it will be the first world again."

"I don’t think so," Max replied. "Liz…of my time…brought that up, but I think…Tess cares about us all now. Six years ago, she cared about me, but not as deeply as she thought, and she didn’t have any real connections with Isabel and Michael. Now she does. They’re her best friends. She’s also good friends with Serena, and she wants to be friends with you. I think she’ll be hurt if I betray her—hurt enough not to go to the Skins—but not enough to leave. Not when there are other people on the line."

"What if it backfires?" Liz asked. "What if she goes to them on purpose, as allies?"

"It can’t be worse than it already is," Max said steadily, knowledge and pain clear in his face. Liz swallowed, and nodded, understanding far too well.

"Why me? Why…this? You should go to Isabel. She could convince…you…more. It wouldn’t be so manipulative. There’s enough lying already."

"It wouldn’t work," Max replied, releasing her hands and standing up. She folded her empty hands in her lap and stared at them for a while as he paced and explained. "Isabel wouldn’t believe me. First of all, she loves Tess like a sister and…Isabel thinks she’s the one that’s going to betray us."

Liz’s head shot up. "Why?"

"Widdicker told her that she did in our last life. Isabel never told us, it just festered in her heart until we found out about Tess. Widdicker was either mistaken about Isabel’s identity or she was lying to throw her off. Anyway, Isabel wouldn’t believe me." He paused in his pacing and looked at her with hooded eyes. "And I wouldn’t believe her."

"She’s your sister."

"But Tess is…was…my girlfriend, my partner. And even if I did believe…Isabel, Michael and I would have no choice. We could never trust Tess again. We’d have to execute her. And she doesn’t deserve that."

"She betrayed you," Liz pointed out, her voice scathing.

"But out of love," Max replied softly. "She never meant any harm. The same thing happened before…she wanted to help me, to prove that she was worthy to be my wife—she was below me in station on our planet, and never felt she was worthy—and she thought she was powerful enough to keep control of the situation. But she couldn’t."

"And that’s why you’re here," Liz said softly. Max nodded. She looked back down at her hands for a long moment, a thousand things whirling through her mind. How could she do this? How could she completely change her life again? Not to mention convincing someone to betray the person they loved…it would be just like what Tess had tried to do to her, when Tess first came to Roswell. How could she?

She had to. The world was at stake. Again.

She looked up, and found Max watching her. "Why do you think I’ll suceed? You said Tess was your girlfriend, your lover…you’ve known her for two lifetimes. How am I supposed to compete with that? We’ve hardly even spoken in years! Why should you turn from her to me?"

"Because the only person I ever loved more than Tess was you," Max replied softly, and Liz suddenly found herself lost in his eyes, as if the last six years had never happened. As if he loved her again. And she knew she would do whatever was necessary, whatever was possible, to have him look at her like that again.

*

"She didn’t sound mad, did she?" Maria asked, for the millionth time.

"No," Serena replied firmly, then hesitated. "Just a little down…" A panicked expression crossed Maria’s face and Tess sighed, fishing into her purse.

"Here, call her," she ordered, handing the phone to Maria, who gave her a grateful look and moved to the edges of the crowd where it was quieter. Tess turned to Max, who was watching Maria dial.

"Want to dance?" she asked hopefully. Max turned his attention back to his girlfriend, looking startled.

"If you want."

"Come on!" Tess gave an apologetic look to Serena, who shrugged, then dragged Max onto the dance floor. Max linked his arms behind Tess’s back and danced, obviously distracted. He watched Serena sneak up on Michael, and Maria talking on the cell phone, a worried crease in her forehead.

"Max, you’re not paying attention," Tess scolded him. He pulled his attention back abruptly, wondering why he cared so much about Maria’s phone call. It wasn’t like Liz cared…

"Sorry."

"What’s wrong?"

"Nothing," Max said quickly, trying to displace her fear. Tess didn’t look convinced, but she did’t try to push and Max lapsed back into silence.

"Is this about Liz?" she asked finally, though he had the feeling it was more because she wanted something to say than because she was truly worried. Or wondering.

"Of course not," Max replied. "It’s been six years Tess. I don’t…" He paused, looking down at her, wondering what to say. How could he reassure her when he didn’t even know if he was telling the truth? In a way he did of course…he knew that he loved Tess, and that he could never forgive Liz for what she’d done. But beyond that…he had no idea. And it didn’t matter anyway. He was with Tess now.

"I know," Tess reassured him. "It was just a question."

Max pulled Tess closer as the next song began, slow and sweet. And over her head, his eyes drifted to Maria, who was hanging up with as worried a face as when she dialed.

*

"I told you," Future Max said as Liz hung up the phone wearily.

"I believe you, all right?" she said softly, turning to watch him as she leaned back against the counter.

"What’d she say?" Max asked, a faint smile ghosting over his face. "I’ve been wondering for six years."

"Why?"

"Because I was worried about you…when she called. And Maria looked worried."

"Maria worries too much," Liz dismissed it. "We have more important things to discuss anyway."

"Yes, we do," Max agreed.

"So tell me Max, what would make you love me again?" Liz asked, crossing her arms. His eyes darkened and for a moment she feared to hear his answer. But just for a moment. Things couldn’t get much worse from here.

"The truth," he finally replied.

"I can’t tell you the truth. I mean…him. He’ll want to know what made me change my mind. You’d never be with me if it endangered others’ lives. And you already said I couldn’t tell him about Tess."

"Then…part of the truth. Have Kyle tell me you didn’t sleep together. That you were miserable about doing it." He paused. "You didn’t, right?"

"No," Liz said shortly.

"Maria’s worried about you, isn’t she? Confess to her that you still love…me… With any luck, she’ll let something slip."

"Do we have time for luck?" Liz asked. "I got the impression you were in a hurry."

"I am. But we have to do this the right way if we want it to work. And it has to work."

Liz nodded, and avoided his eyes, and wondered if his adamance was even the little, tiniest bit because of her.

"So I get Kyle and Maria to soften you up and then what…dress up in a low cut black shirt and read your favorite book in an opportune place?"

Max winced slightly. "No. Just talk to him. Tell him that you miss him. That you were wrong, and you regret it. Tell him you love him and you don’t think he’s really happy with Tess. That you’ve seen them together and you don’t think he loves her the way he…I…loved you. Ask if Tess sees stars when they’re together."

Liz stared at him, unable to look away, amazed at the litany. At the specific words. Was it just that he’d thought about this in the future? Was it only that they’d discussed what could make this work?

Or was it that he’d thought all these things himself, a thousand times, and wished them to be true? Or wished them not to be.

"That’s pretty specific," Liz said steadily, and found her eyes caught in his.

"You need specifics." She nodded, and glanced around.

"Are you hungry? Can I get you anything?" He shook his head. "Do you have a place to sleep? I can leave a note for Maria and Serena so they won’t come into my room." He gave her a startled look and she quickly continued. "You can sleep beside the bed. That way even if they peek in they won’t see you." He relaxed, and nodded, and silence descended again.

"What was it like?" Max asked finally.

"What?"

"Giving up our life together?" Liz swallowed and turned away from him, wandering into the kitchen, opening and closing cupboards before she finally turned back.

"It was scary. And…heartbreaking. And indescribable." Silence followed her words again, thick and tense.

"Can you talk to Kyle tomorrow morning?" Max asked.

"I’ll stop by the sheriff’s office before class," Liz promised.

"And Maria?"

"Tomorrow morning at breakfast." After another moment of silence, Liz gave up. She was tired and confused and terrified. And hopeful. Hopeful, after six years of knowing there was no hope, ever.

But now there was Max, or the possibility of him. And the knowledge that if she failed again it would all have been for nothing. She’d have given up fourteen years of love and happiness for a different path to the same conclusion. Only this time there were only ten years, and they would probably all be miserable.

When Liz lay in bed that night, with Max’s soft breathing audible from the floor beside her, she knew finally that she was important to the world. Maybe she was the most important of them all. Because while they all did things, had powers and roles to play—she, Liz Parker, was the one who could fail to save the world twice.

Part Three

"You were right," Liz said the minute the apartment door closed after Serena, on her way to a morning class. Maria blinked and looked up.

"Huh?"

"You were right," Liz repeated, laying down her cereal spoon and looking seriously up at her friend.

"Are you willing to sign to that?" Maria demanded. "This has got to be some kind of record. Liz Parker admitting that I am right."

Liz glared and Maria finally got the picture that this was not a joke. "About what exactly am I correct?"

"Max. And me."

It took a moment for it to sink in, at which point Maria nearly choked on a bite of breakfast cereal. "You…you…what about you and Max?"

Liz looked down at the table and told herself she wasn’t lying to her friend. She was finally telling the truth…kind of. "I’m still in love with him." There was a shocked silence and Liz finally peeked up to see Maria sitting stunningly still, staring at her with very wide eyes.

"But you…why…I-I don’t get it. Why’d you…"

"Lose my virginity to Kyle while Max was practically kissing my shoes?" Liz supplied bitterly. "I didn’t."

"But you-you—" Maria stammered.

"I didn’t sleep with Kyle. I asked him to help me pretend I did…I thought Max would be coming over. I wanted him to see," Liz said softly. She’d decided that it was safest to stick as close to the truth as possible.

"Why?" Maria demanded incredulously.

"Because I thought he belonged with Tess." She looked up and met Maria’s eyes, letting a little of the old pain shine through. "But I think I was wrong. Or else I was right and I just can’t live without him."

"Oh my god…" Maria whispered, and was immediately across the room, enfolding Liz in her arms. The brunette returned the hug gratefully, if not entirely for the reasons Maria thought. "What are you going to do? Do you want Max back?"

Liz pulled away slightly, answering immediately, without thought, "Yes." She paused and amended it. "I don’t know. I mean, I don’t want to hurt Tess, and if Max rejected me, I don’t think I could take it but…I think I need him. I feel like half a person without him."

"So you do want him back?" Maria clarified.

"It’s complicated Maria," Liz replied. "I just had to tell someone. It’s hurt so much for so long…and I wanted you to know that I didn’t purposely betray and hurt Max."

"I never thought—" Maria began, but Liz cut her off.

"You did. You stayed my friend anyway…but you and everyone else thought that I was hurt Max for casual sex at the best, or direct maliciousness at the worst. I just wanted someone to know the truth."

"I believe you," Maria promised. Liz glanced at her watch and made a show of jumping up from the table.

"I really have to go, I need to talk to my professor before class. Thank you for listening."

"Of course, that’s what best friends are for," Maria assured her. Liz paused in the middle of picking up her bag.

"Promise me you won’t say anything. Not to Max, not to anyone."

"I would never—"

"Promise."

"I promise," Maria swore. "Now, have a good day and tonight we’ll have tons of ice cream and watch ‘Dirty Dancing’."

"Sounds perfect," Liz agreed with a smile, grabbing her keys off the counter and heading out the door. "Remember, don’t tell anyone!" she called over her should as the door closed behind her.

"I promise!" Maria called after her, then waitedwith baited breath as Liz’s steps got fainter in the hall, and the elevator dinged. Then she made a mad dash to the phone and called Max.

"Hello?" he answered the phone.

"Max, it’s Maria. I need to talk to you. Now."

*

A bell rang as Liz pushed open the front door of the sheriff’s office. Kyle was standing at the front desk in his new uniform. She smiled involuntarily at the site as he looked up and registered her presence.

"Hey Liz. What’s up? Do you need to talk to my dad?" he asked, gesturing back toward Sheriff Valenti’s office. Liz shook her head, securing her bag on her shoulder and walking over to the counter.

"Actually, I need to talk to you. Is there somewhere…more private?"

"Uh…sure," Kyle said, shrugging. "We can go into the records room."

"Thanks." Liz followed Kyle back into the small room and waited for him to close the door after them.

"So, what did you want to talk to me about?" Kyle asked, obviously curious.

"It’s about…remember when you helped me, by um, pretending that we…"

"Yeah." Liz looked down, not sure how to say this in the right way. She didn’t want him to be suspicious of her motives, but she also needed his help.

"Kyle, I’ve come to really regret that decision and well…could you tell Max the truth?" she asked quickly, the words spilling out. He blinked, startled.

"Well…sure. I guess. Why?" This was the tricky part. She needed him to draw his own conclusions from her words…without actually telling him.

"I just…I hate having him think that of me. I thought I could do it…thought I could live that lie, but I just can’t anymore. I care ab—that is, I hate lying," Liz amended, knowing he would catch what she didn’t say. "But I know he wouldn’t believe me if I told him."

"So why did you do it?" Kyle asked. Liz’s head came up quickly, alarmed, and he shook his head. "I just think Max will want to know. It just seems kind of suspicious. He’s with Tess now…"

"I know that," Liz replied, trying to put as much hurt into her voice as possible. "That’s how I thought it should be. That’s why I did it. Because I thought he would be better off with her. Would be happier." She looked down again, as if she was trying to hide emotion.

"So you’re taking it back…"

"Because maybe he is better off, but I can’t…I just can’t live like this anymore. Don’t tell him I asked you to, please." She looked back up, her eyes wide and pleading. He nodded.

"Sure. Is that everything?"

"Yeah. Thank you," Liz said sincerely.

"No problem. Are you okay?" he asked, looking a bit concerned. Liz nodded quickly—a little too quickly.

"I’m great," she replied in an extremely false tone and walked past him out the door. "Thanks again Kyle."

"Like I said, it’s not a problem. I’m glad to help."

"Look, I have to go to class, but if you ever need anything, or want to talk—"

"It’s okay," Kyle assured her with a smile. "Go on." Liz returned the smile and fled, praying it was enough. Praying it would help at all.

*

"Oh my god Max. Oh my god," Maria repeated. Max blinked, bemused and looked around the empty C rashdown.

"Is everything okay?" he asked.

"Nuh!" Maria exclaimed, pulling him to a table. The café didn’t open for lunch for another hour, so she had time to tell him everything. And she did mean everything. Max had been a little worried when he’d gotten Maria’s call, but she hadn’t sounded worried-freaked out, just need to share-freaked out.

"Calm down," Max counseled. "What’s wrong?"

"What isn’t wrong?" Maria replied. "Max, you have to swear you will tell no one I told you this. Especially not Liz. She would kill me."

"I promise," Max said quickly, intrigued at the mention of Liz. Was that what this was about? "You can tell me."

"I have to tell you!" Maria exclaimed, grabbing his hands across the table and looking into his eyes. "Liz is still in love with you," she said slowly and clearly, as if she was afraid he would misunderstand. "She never even slept with Kyle. And she’s been miserable for six years."

Max nearly missed the part about Kyle. After the words ‘Liz is still in love with you’ the rest of the world pretty much ceased to exist for him. Maria’s voice seemed very, very far away, back with the reality of Tess, and destiny, and betrayal.

Liz loved him. She still loved him.

The bit about Kyle finally sunk in. "She never…what? I don’t understand," Max stuttered.

"She never slept with Kyle. It was this whole ruse thing cause she thought you were better off with Tess. And look how well that turned out. That is, um, she thought she’d be okay, but she hasn’t been. Not to insult your relationship with Tess or anything," Maria said quickly, though they both knew Maria had never approved of the fourth alien.

"But why that?" Max demanded, the pain still vivid in his mind. He’d been so hopeful, so sure that he could convince her, that she would somehow give him a chance. He’d loved her so much, and he’d known, completely, absolutely, that nothing would ever turn him away from her.

And then he’d seen her, lying there, so comfortable and happy, with Kyle. Who was human, and unencumbered by responsibility…and everything Max could never be.

It had hurt so much. So very much. It still hurt.

And now Maria was telling him it had all been a lie?

"She didn’t know any other way to get you to be with Tess. I still think she’s insane, but she’s obviously suffering for it. I mean, she was nearly in tears this morning when she told me about it. She’s been trying to get over you for six years! Six freaking years! What is it about you?" Maria demanded, throwing up her hands.

"I have no idea," Max replied truthfully, still not thinking clearly.

"Well you have to do something," Maria said matter-of-factly. Max blinked, his mind starting to clear. Liz loved him.

"I’m with Tess," he replied stupidly.

"Duh! But you can’t just leave Liz miserable!" Maria exclaimed. "You still care about her, don’t you?"

That was the question, wasn’t it?

"I don’t know," Max murmured, though he was desperately afraid that he did.

"Well we have to do something. She’s my best friend, and she’s been moping over you for six years. She sacrificed her happiness for you!"

"What do you want me to do?" Max asked. "There’s Tess…I can’t…" Maria bit her lip and looked down, drumming her fingers on the table.

"Right. And you don’t even know if Liz was telling the truth. That is, I do know, but I can see how it would be doubtworthy…"

"It’s been six years. She could have reasons to lie," Max agreed gently. Maria’s fingers tapped harder. She was obviously really worried. What had Liz said to her? And why had she said it, now, after six years? Was it really that terrible living without him? Could she really not take it any more?

If he didn’t have Tess, would he have been able to take it?

"I have to go to work," Max said finally. "It’s my break…"

"Right. Don’t tell anyone, okay?" Maria asked.

"Not a word, I promise. Thank you for telling me Maria," Max said sincerely, standing up.

"Seems like it’s going to do a whole lot of good," she muttered, standing up as well and smoothing her uniform. She looked up at him, eyes wide and concerned.

"I’m really worried about Liz. If you care about her at all…she’s really unhappy. You could fix that," Maria pleaded. Max closed his eyes, unable to take the thought of Liz so miserable that Maria felt she had to beg for his help.

"I’m not free," he whispered.

"If you loved her enough you could be," Maria replied forlornly. She sighed suddenly. "I know, I know, no pressure. Just…think about what would really make you happy. Someone’s going to get hurt here, no matter what happens. You just have to find out what will hurt you less."

"I know," Max said, and left, not for work, but to walk the streets of Roswell for hours, trying to make some sense of his own heart.

*

"Max?" He looked up from his desk as the receptionist, Kayla, knocked apologetically on the doorframe. "Someone to see you."

For a moment Max’s heart leapt, and then he stopped it. It couldn’t be Liz. "Who is it?"

"Someone from the sheriff’s office?" Kayla shrugged. "Can you see him?"

Sheriff Valenti. Or Kyle…

"Let him in," Max replied, pushing away his keyboard (not that he’d touched it in an hour anyway) and sitting back. He’d been writing for the Roswell daily newspaper since his junior year of college. It was a good cover job, especially when he needed to travel, and he made lots of contacts. Kayla stepped back and the door opened wider, admitting Kyle. What was he doing here?

"Kyle," Max said.

"Max. Do you have a minute?" Kyle asked, shutting the door behind him.

"Sure," Max said neutrally, wondering if he should ask. What he would do if Kyle said they had been together… "I actually wanted to talk to you. Sit down." Kyle sat, looking a little uncomfortable. It was odd seeing Kyle in uniform. He’d been so adamant about not being in law enforcement…and that’s right where he’d ended up. Buddhist principles and all.

"You can go first," they said at the same time, and then stopped. Max motioned for Kyle to speak. Kyle shifted in his chair.

"Well…you remember when I slept with Liz?" Kyle asked. Max froze.

"I seem to recall something of the sort."

"I didn’t." Max let out a slow breath. "I never slept with Liz. And you don’t know how much it hurts my ego to admit something like that." Max nearly smiled.

"If you never—"

"Liz asked me for a favor," Kyle continued. "She knew you were coming over, and she wanted you to think we’d had sex. I guess she thought you should be with Tess."

It was true. It was all…true.

"Why?" Max breathed. "And why are you telling me now?"

"I don’t really know all Liz’s reasons but…hey, I’m not a bad guy. I saw Liz the other day and she just seemed…I’m worried about her. I’m not the world’s greatest expert on women, but I can tell that she’s miserable. I just thought you should know the truth. If you ask me, I think she strayed off the Way, she lost the balance…too much sacrifice and self-pity, not enough happiness." Kyle shrugged. "I just don’t like to see someone that unhappy."

"You think she’s really miserable?" Max asked carefully.

"Yeah," Kyle replied with certainty plain in his voice. "That’s one depressed chick. And I think it’s all your fault Evans."

"It was her idea…I didn’t know…" Max protested.

"All right, it’s all her fault. But it’s because of you," Kyle amended, standing up. "Look, I have to get back to work…was there something you needed to talk to me about?"

Max shook his head, distracted. "No, it was nothing. Thank you for telling me."

"No problem. I just hope it gets sorted out."

"Thanks."

Max watched Kyle go and wished that was all it took to sort this out.

Part Four

"Well?" Max asked. Liz jumped, startled and on edge, and then carefully shut the door behind her.

"I forgot you were here," she said in explanation. "I talked to Maria and Kyle. I think they both took the bait. I don’t know. Tonight is—"

"Alex’s birthday, I know," Max finished. "You’ll see me."

"And see if Maria talked to you," Liz agreed. "I have to change. Any suggestions?"

"The blue skirt with embroidery and the v-neck tank top," Max replied easily. Liz blinked.

"Wow, you do have a good memory," she said, going to her closet to pull out the dress.

"Actually, I just looked through your closet while you were gone," Max smiled. "But it did bring back some memories." Liz thought about some of the things in her closet and blushed, resisting the impulse to throw a shoe at him.

"Well, thanks for the input," she said dryly, laying out her outfit and picking out some strappy heeled sandals to go with it.

"Anytime."

"Could you…turn around?" Liz asked, reaching for the hem of her shirt, but he’d already started. Another difference. The last Future Max to visit her had been used to seeing her undress…this one was uncomfortable at the thought. She slipped out of her clothes and quickly pulled on the skirt and top. "All right, you can turn back."

"Tonight is very important," Max said unnecessarily as he turned around. He paused as his eyes lit on her, and stopped speaking, as if he’d forgotten what he was planning to say.

"Good choice?" Liz asked.

"Very good," Max assured her in a soft, husky voice. Liz shivered suddenly and reached for her shoes, bending down to put them on so she wouldn’t have to meet his eyes.

"Is it too soon to talk to you face-to-face? Or should I take the plunge?"

"We don’t have much time. You better try and get me alone tonight. At least to talk." Liz nodded as she straightened.

"Hair?"

"A little touseled."

"I better go," she said. "Make-up’s in the bathroom and stuff…and Maria and Serena are waiting for me."

"Okay. I’ll be lurking around if you need me."

"Just stay out of sight," Liz pleaded earnestly.

"I know. Good luck."

"Think I’ll need it?" Liz asked lightly, grabbing a jacket. Max looked her up and down, his eyes dark.

"No," he said seriously, and Liz shivered again and hurried out of the room without a backward look.

*

"What is going on?" Tess demanded again, grabbing Max’s arm and stopping just outside the Crashdown. "I know something’s wrong. Tell me." She arched her eyebrows at him, waiting. Hoping. He’d been acting weird ever since he came home from work. He wouldn’t talk, he would hardly look at her…and he tried to get out of going to the party. The night before he’d been happy about going!

"Nothing’s wrong," Max insisted. "Let’s just go inside."

"No! Not until you tell me," Tess said stubbornly, crossing her arms. It was about the granolith, wasn’t it? Why wouldn’t he just listen to her…but no, it didn’t matter. She was going to deal with it herself. And in four days, when she brought him all the information he needed, he would be all right again. He would look at her again.

"There’s nothing to tell," Max promised. "Look, we’re late. Can we talk about this later? You’re being irrational."

"I’m being irrational? At least I’m willing to say more than two words at a time!"

"I just said—" Max began, and cut himself off. He took a deep breath and shook his head. "Let’s just go in Tess."

"Fine!" she exclaimed, marching past him and inside. She waited for him to follow, and when his footsteps didn’t come she stopped and whirled around, chilled. He was standing outside, in the dark, staring after her, into the party…staring beyond her. Tess frowned and turned, following his gaze…

To Liz. He was staring at Liz Parker like she held his soul in her hands.

Tess closed her eyes and prayed she was wrong about the look in his eyes.

*

"C’ mon, just a little strip tease?" Liz cajoled, batting her eyes at Alex. He moaned and covered his face with his hands. At twenty three, Alex was about three inches taller than he’d been at seventeen, his skinniness replaced by lean muscles. His grin, however, was just the same.

"If I killed you, you could never tell anyone about that you know," he threatened.

"Strip tease?" Rory, Alex’s current girlfriend, asked in a very interested voice. She arched her eyebrows at her boyfriend. "Alex, what haven’t you told me?"

"He has a night job at Chippendales," Maria put in, appearing at Liz’s elbow. "I’ve heard he’s quite the crowd favorite too."

"Heard?" Liz inquired. "Do I need to tell Rory how much you spent last time you went?"

"Oh no, no," Alex put in, "Maria’s a cheapskate."

"So what do you usually charge?" Rory inquired, eyes glinting. "Say, for a private showing…"

"I think we might be able to make a deal," Alex murmured, pulling her closer. Liz supressed a pang. Why had she never been able to have that with anyone normal? She’d had boyfriends since Max…but mostly she’d just liked them all as friends. None of them brought out any passion in her. Everything they did and said, she couldn’t help comparing to Max. And none of them ever measured up.

"You okay?" Maria whispered and Liz realized she’d let her thoughts show a little.

"Fine," she replied quickly, forcing a smile and glancing around. Tess was standing just inside the door, watching her with an awful expression…and just past her, still outside, was Max. Only she couldn’t see his face. Liz looked quickly away, back to Alex and Maria.

"I think we should turn up the music," she suggested, forcing a bright expression. "What do you guys think?"

"Sounds good to me," Rory agreed. Alex acquiesced, so Liz escaped to the back to play with the sound system, her heart beating overtime. Max was here. And she had to talk to him. She had to find some way to get him alone…But how? And what was she going to say to him when she had him?

Liz popped in a mix CD and an old Matchbox Twenty song came on. She delayed longer, fiddling with CD cases and wondering what she was going to do, how she was going to get him away…

And then the door to the back room opened, and Max walked in. Liz started, and he looked…guilty? Worried?

Did Maria tell him?

"Hi," Liz said awkwardly.

"Hi. I…can I talk to you?" Max asked. Liz nodded quickly, stepping away from the stereo, farther into the back room.

"I actually wanted to talk to you too," she said, in as firm of a tone as she could manage. "But um…you can go first."

"If you…"

"No, go on." Max nodded, watching her intently.

"Kyle told me that you and he never…" Liz pretended to be startled.

"He did? Why?" she asked, her mind whirling. So at least half of it had worked. And Max didn’t seem angry, which was a good sign.

"He said he was worried about you. And he thought you regretted what happened. Do you?" Max’s voice was strange, intense and…almost afraid. As if he couldn’t bear to hear her answer, but he needed to hear it at the same time.

"It doesn’t really matter, does it?" Liz asked carefully, avoiding his eyes. "You’re with Tess."

"It matters."

Something moved inside Liz…hope, maybe, or the faintest feeling of joy. But she hadn’t won yet.

"Yes. Yes, I regret it," she said truthfully, wholeheartedly, and finally met his eyes. "Is that all you wanted to know?" His eyes were painfully familiar. Six years ago, she would have said he was about to kiss her. But he wouldn’t, of course. Not now.

"Why?"

The music was playing, seeping into the room. Liz had always loved this song. It used to make her cry.

Don’t think that I can take another empty moment Don’t think that I can fake another hollow smile It’s not enough just to be sorry. Don’t think that I could take another talk about it

"Why do I regret it? Or why did I do it? I…assume Kyle told you the second one. I regret it because…I don’t want to talk about this Max. Not now."

"I think we have to," Max replied quietly. "Please. I need to know."

"Why?" Liz cried vehemently. "So you can feel better about being with Tess? So you can go back out there and be content with your life? Because I can’t. I gave that up for you and yes, I regret it. Every day of my life I wish I was just a little bit more selfish, because then I wouldn’t be so miserable and you wouldn’t be…" She cut off, putting a hand over her mouth, fully aware that she had just told him everything he wanted to know. Everything she needed him to know. "I miss you Max. That’s why I regret it. I miss you."

Don’t you know I feel the darkness closing in Tried to be more than me And I gave till it all went away And we’ve only surrendered To the worst part of these winters we’ve made

"Liz…" She paused, and looked up into his eyes. He was closer now…when had he come closer? His hand touched her arm, and she saw it all over again, was swallowed by the images of stars and him, and the feel of his arms around her.

Just from the touch of his hand. She was trembling, shaken, lost, just from the brush of his hand.

"Do you hate me?" Liz asked, gazing up at him, wondering what he saw when he touched her. If he saw anything at all.

Did Tess see stars when they were together?

"I could never hate you," Max replied.

"Then say something. This hurts too much to keep going."

"We make our own destinies," said Max, though by the expression in his eyes he didn’t even know why. Neither did she. She closed her eyes and winced away.

"I wish I could believe that," she said, totally, completely honest for a moment. "I wish I knew how." And then she fled, because she was afraid if she stayed she would tell him far more than he could know.

*

The night was cool, clear and starry. Liz stood in the back alley, leaned against the outside of the Crashdown, and wondered what she was going to do. What she had almost done.

If she’d stayed there another moment, she would have told him. She would have confessed her lies and fears and love, confessed that destiny was not hers to make after all. And what then? Would he think she was crazy? Would he believe her, and instead turn against Tess?

She wasn’t strong enough for this. She didn’t know how to be strong enough. When she was pulling away she could do it. Everything she said then was a lie, everything she did. She’d been distancing herself completely from him. But now…now she was trying to pull him back. Telling him how she felt, how she really felt, but still hiding huge parts of herself, her motivations from him. Half-truths were so much harder than lies.

"What happened?" a voice asked and Liz jumped, startled by the sudden appearance of Max—Future Max. "Sorry."

"It’s all right. I was just…startled," she replied tensely.

"Well?" he prompted.

"We talked. Maria told you I think. You said Kyle talked to you, but I think they both did. Anyway, I confirmed everything. That I still love you, that I’ve been miserable…that I can’t go on like this anymore." Liz paused, looking up at him. His face was shrouded with shadows.

"What did he say?" Max asked.

"We make our own destiny," Liz whispered hollowly. "Look I…just need to be alone for a minute, all right?"

"You can’t give up," Max reminded her. "You have to convince him."

"I’m working on it," Liz replied tensely. "I just need a minute." He paused, and she glanced up, all she could see of him the outline of his muscled arms, the deeper shadow of his eyes in the darkness of his face.

"Is it that bad?" he asked softly, as if he couldn’t help it. Liz paused, searching the face she could not see.

"No, it’s that good," she admitted. "I don’t want to start hoping, or I’ll never stop."

"Sometimes you’re allowed to hope," Max promised, and melted away into the darkness before she could say a word, before he could see the gleam of starlight on the tears in her eyes.

Part Five

"Oh, that was so sweet," Maria giggled, recalling the look on Alex’s face when he was offered a recording contract three years ago. "I thought they were going to withdraw the offer you looked like such an idiot."

"Sounds like a good time," Tess commented wryly.

"Oh, it was," Serena agreed. "Then Max spilled the soda all over band equipment—"

"And the executive guy started laughing so hard that he nearly had a heart attack, and then Alex nearly had a heart attack, and Max was all ready to put the healy-power on the guy," Maria finished, laughing. "Where is Max anyway?"

All eyes turned to Tess, who looked pale and forced a smile. "I think he wandered outside or something. He wasn’t feeling very good."

It was Maria’s turn to look pale. "Any reason?" she asked, trying desperately to sound nonchalant.

"I don’t know," Tess replied, shaking her head.

"And look, here he is now," Serena remarked as Max emerged from the back room, looking slightly shaken but smiling. He walked over to Tess and took her hand, the only hint of anything odd in his eyes.

"We were just talking about you," Alex informed him. "Remember how you nearly cost me a recording contract?"

"I vaguely recall the incident," Max replied easily.

"Well, I’d just like you to know that you’re not forgiven yet," Alex said, his eyes twinkling.

"Thank you," Max replied wryly.

"No problem."

"Can I talk to you Max?" Maria asked suddenly, breaking into the conversation. Tess lost the tenuous smile she’d gained as Max stood by her.

"Sure," he replied, releasing his girlfriend’s hand and following Maria over to a corner of the café. "What do you want to talk to me about?"

"Where’s Liz?" Maria hissed.

"I don’t know," Max replied truthfully.

"Well where was she? Did you talk to her?"

"Yes," he admitted.

"And?" Maria prompted.

"Maria, I can’t…" he paused and tried again. "There’s nothing I can do. Nothing that can be done…"

"Then she told you," Maria guessed.

"She told me something," Max admitted. "For whatever good it will do either of us."

"It could do a lot of good, if you would just get off your ass and stop pretending!" Maria exclaimed in a low voice. "You know, this whole not-caring thing is so obviously a ruse. You still love her. You. Still. Love. Her."

Max looked around, even though he knew her voice was so quiet no one else could hear it. Looked around, and found himself looking into Tess’s eyes. She was watching them, emotions blazing in her eyes. Max looked away quickly, pretending he hadn’t noticed, pretending the conversation was less intense, less personal.

"Smile," he muttered to Maria, who went from scowling to the worst fake-grin he’d ever seen.

"Tell me you don’t love her," she gritted from between clenched teeth.

"I can’t do that," Max replied easily, through a much more natural smile.

"Then you do," Maria caught him.

"I don’t know Maria. I don’t know. And I’m with Tess now."

"Right. Then why are you still standing here talking to me?"

Without another word, Max swung around and walked over to his girlfriend, who tried to look nonchalant, giving her some excuse about Maria being annoyed with Michael. Behind him, Maria crossed her arms, glared at his back and worried about her best friend’s future.

*

"It was a marvelous party Alex," Liz said sincerely, her hand on her friend’s arm.

"C ouldn’t have done it without you," he replied with a wink. She grinned and leaned over to kiss his cheek before accepting her jacket from Serena, who’d appeared at her elbow.

" ‘Night Alex," Serena said, kissing him on the other cheek. "Don’t have too much fun celebrating." She winked at Rory, who grinned back and wrapped a possessive arm around her boyfriend.

"We’ll keep it lawful," Alex promised.

"That’s all a girl can ask," Liz replied with a wink. "Where did Maria go?"

"Oh, I think she’s moping in the kitchen," Serena sighed. "It’s one or the other. I just can’t win with roomates."

"How do you know it’s not both?" Liz asked with a mocking grin—mocking herself of course, because the only reason she wasn’t moping in the kitchen was that Maria was already there.

"Oh please don’t say that," Serena moaned, half-joking, though the look in her eyes took on a worried quality.

"I’ll get Maria, we should get out of here. It’s late." Serena nodded acquiescence and Liz waved to Alex and Rory as she walked into the back and the kitchen. Maria was putting away leftover food.

"You know, you don’t work twenty four hours a day," Liz reminded her, leaning on the doorframe. Maria looked up and acknowledged her with a glum smile.

"Yeah, but who’d ever know?" she replied. She paused and looked up at Liz. "How do you do it?"

"Do what?" Liz asked.

"Pretend everything’s okay. I saw you. You dissapeared for forty five minutes, fifteen of them with Max. And then you came back and you laughed and you teased and you didn’t look at him. Not once. I watched you. How do you do it?" Maria demanded. Liz crossed her harms over her stomach.

"I’ve been doing it for six years Maria," she replied quietly. "It’s just a way of life."

"But how can you live like that?" Maria appealed.

"I don’t think I can," Liz replied honestly. "You just do what you have to do."

"But what if you don’t have to do it anymore?" Maria asked. Liz shrugged slightly.

"I don’t know, I’ve never tried," Liz murmured, trying to hold back tears. She took a deep breath and put on her jacket. "Come on, let’s go home Maria."

"He still loves you," Maria said, following her friend out of the kitchen.

"Did he tell you that?" Liz asked, unsure if she could handle hearing the answer. Whatever it was.

"Not in so many words. But it was obvious. It’ll just take a little work, and you’ll have him."

"I hope so," Liz whispered, adding under her breath, "I really hope so."

*

"What were you doing?" Tess asked, trying to sound casual as she unlocked the door to their apartment and led Max inside.

"When?" Max asked, though he knew perfectly well. Tess closed the door behind herself carefully and put down her purse, avoiding looking at him.

"When you went into the back room. Where Liz was." She kept not looking at him as she took off her jacket and watched into living room, flipping on a light switch.

"Nothing," Max replied carefully. Tess noticed he didn’t deny the fact that Liz had been there. That he’d followed her.

"Max, I’m not stupid," Tess told him, the casual tone seeping out of her voice. She turned slowly around, leaning back against the couch. "What’s going on?"

He was standing in the doorway, watching her, looking pained and far away.

"Nothing is going on," he told her firmly. She didn’t believe him.

"You’re a terrible liar."

"I probably am," he admitted. Her heart sunk.

"So something is going on with Liz."

"No. Nothing is going on Tess."

"Then why are you looking at me like that?" she demanded. He started, as if just realizing how he’d been staring at her, how his eyes had penetrated into her sould as if he was searching for something and finding it missing.

"I’m just tired," he said finally. "Let’s go to bed."

"I’m not tired," Tess replied stubbornly.

"I am," Max sighed, walking past her towards their bedroom. He paused, just behind her, and one hand reached out to take her wrist. She yearned to turn and rush into his arms, but there was something he wasn’t telling her. So much he wasn’t telling her. And she had the most terrible feeling that she wasn’t the person he wanted in his arms.

"Tess, I love you," Max said softly, and she did turn, involuntarily. He was regarding her steadily with those beautiful brown eyes. "That’s all that matters."

She couldn’t say anything, couldn’t find words for the catch of her breath, the fear in the pit of her stomach. Didn’t have words for the knowledge that his eyes told her he was lying. After a long moment he let go of her wrist and walked by, into the bedroom, and closed the door after him.

"Not all," Tess whispered, but he didn’t hear her.

Part Six

Liz couldn’t sleep. Every time she closed her eyes she saw Max’s face when he saw her with Kyle. And then every time she opened her eyes she saw Max watching her with that look in his eyes, like he couldn’t bear to not touch her for another second.

"Where are you going?" Future Max asked the second she slipped out of bed and grabbed a sweatshirt to go over her tank top and pajama pants.

"I thought you were asleep," she said, pulling her hair back into a ponytail and pulling on shoes.

"I sleep lightly," he replied shortly.

"I’m going for a walk," Liz admitted. "I can’t sleep."

"I’ll come with you," Max said without hesitation, standing up. He was wearing his leather pants. And only his leather pants.

"Could you put on a shirt?" Liz asked. "Generally, people don’t go out in public unclothed."

"I wasn’t planning on it," Max assured her. She waited for a beat and he reached for his leather vest, shrugging into it.

"You don’t have to come with me," Liz attempted, eyeing him nervously.

"I can’t sleep either," Max admitted. "All right, I’m ready."

"Quiet," Liz ordered, and opened the door to the room gently, tiptoeing out. Max followed silently and Liz held her breath until they were out of the apartment, when she relaxed. "I would just love to see Maria’s reaction when she found me sneaking out with the hairy version of you."

"I can imagine," Max laughed. Liz grinned and walked into the elevator, leaning against one wall and watching him as she leaned against the opposite one.

"What’s it like?" Liz asked impulsively as the elevator stopped and she checked to make sure no one was in the lobby. Signalling him the coast was clear, they escaped outside and across the street to the park.

"What?"

"Coming back in time. Seeing everyone the way they were…"

"It’s…amazing," Max said softly. "In a way I almost think the last four years of my life never happened. It’s like it was all some dream…or a nightmare."

Liz fell silent, thinking of his nightmare, his four years, the end of the world. "Well if this works, it will be just a dream," she pointed out. "You’ll be gone." She glanced sideways at him, biting her lip. He smiled softly back.

"I know. And I hope it happens. I pray every day to whatever higher powers there are that the world will change. That I won’t have to life through that again." Liz looked down at the ground and nodded.

"I understand. I’ll do what I can."

"I know."

They walked in silence for a while, Liz surprised to find how comfortable she was just walking beside him. It just felt…perfect. Just the way it should have been.

Just the way it could be. If she succeeded.

There was a footstep around the bend of the path. Liz’s breath caught. "There’s someone coming," she hissed, pushing Max off to the side of the path.

"It’s me," he breathed. Liz gave him a confused look—how could he know what he would do if things had never happened like this? And if he did know, why hadn’t he warned her—before putting a finger to her lips and shooing him further into the brush.

"Hide," she mouthed, then turned back to the path, and resumed innocent walking. And rounded the bend to find Max walking towards her. The Max of her time—a little younger, a little more innocent. Much more confused.

"Liz."

"Max. What are you doing here?" she asked.

"I couldn’t sleep. What are you…"

"Same." There was a pause as they didn’t look at each other.

"Do you want to…walk?" Max asked, motioning. Liz nodded and started off in the direction she’d been going, away from wherever Future Max was hiding. Her Max followed, falling in beside her.

"I didn’t know you were going to be here," Liz said awkwardly.

"Me neither. I would have…gone elsewhere…"

"Yeah." Liz paused, and frowned, and then stopped in her tracks, turning to him. "Why is that? Why can’t we even run into each other at night?"

"You know why," Max replied quietly.

"I know. But I hate it. I hate this Max. It’s stupid and…and I can’t do it. I can’t keep not knowing what I’m doing, or what you’re doing, or why."

"I don’t know what I’m doing either," Max pointed out, still now, gazing at her. They’d stopped in a parting of the trees, and starlight shone done on Max’s face, illuminating it. Liz had always thought of the stars as his—one of them, somewhere out there, was. And when she kissed him, she saw stars. "But I know why."

Liz’s breath caught slightly, and she met his eyes, and dared, because there was very little to lose.

"Why?"

"You know why I couldn’t sleep? Because every time I closed my eyes I saw you. And every time I opened my eyes I saw you, Liz. I love you. That’s why. Whatever I’m doing, that’s why."

And somewhere, deep inside her despairing mind, Liz heard a few bars of "I Shall Believe" and in that dark night, beneath those bright stars, she reached for Max Evans and found out he was already reaching for her.

*

Stars, like diamonds, strewn across a velvet cloth, swirling, changing, reshaping lives with a word, a thought.

Power, pulsing, within reach…dark power, and bright, and beautiful. The granolith, and a key that was just out of reach.

Liz, sitting on her bed crying away a night where no one else would see her, no one else would know.

Max, watching her across a bright room, eyes on her dark hair, pain in his gut like a wrench. Never knowing why, never understanding. Loving, forever, without hope.

And destiny, like stars, changing with a touch.

*

It was cold without him, dark and empty. A big, wide bed and no one to share it with.

Maybe he was just taking a walk. Clearing his head. Maybe he would be back in a moment, dismissing her worries with a smile, with a touch of his hand. Maybe it was nothing.

And maybe it was everything.

Tess had been awake when Max slipped away. She’d pretended to be asleep…and she’d let him go. Why? To prove it to herself maybe. To prove that he was really going, that he was really choosing to go. That he would come back, or not. That he might come back with smelling of her.

Tess was awake, and waiting, and she knew the second he walked in the front door. She knew.

"You’re awake," he said softly, seeing her on the couch, curled into a corner.

"I’m awake. And you were with Liz."

Shock registered in his eyes, and remorse, before he coul cover it. And more than perfume, that made her sure.

"I couldn’t sleep," he said quickly. "I just went for a walk."

"And ran into Liz?" Tess asked, bitterness creeping into her voice. "That’s likely."

"And true," Max replied quietly.

"So you’re admitting you were with her!" Tess exclaimed, jumping on the words.

"Not by purpose. But yes, I did see Liz."

"See her? And that was it right? That’s why you have her perfume all over you," Tess snapped. Max stepped back, his eyes dark, and she knew she was right. She hated being right. Why couldn’t his eyes be surprised, horrified—but horrified she could possibly think that, not horrified that it was true.

"Tess, I can’t—"

"Do you love her?" Tess asked, curling farther into herself, as if to protect herself against the answer.

"What?"

"Do you love her? Just tell me. Yes or no."

Let it be no. Let it be no.

Max looked her straight in the eyes. "Yes."

Damn him, why couldn’t he be a good liar?

Tess nodded, her face unchanged. She wasn’t going to show him how much it work. She wasn’t going to let him see that with that one word he had torn about her entire world. More than that…what was one world anyway? He’d torn apart her life.

Since she’d been old enough to understand that she was different from everyone around her, she’d known that one day she would find someone who was too. Someone that was like her. That was meant for her. Someone she could love and help and serve…

And he loved someone else more. A human. It wasn’t supposed to be like this.

"I don’t understand," she said softly.

"Do you see things?" he asked suddenly. "When I touch you…when we kiss…do you see things?"

"What are you talking about?" Tess demanded, in no mood for games. She was hardly holding it together as it was. She didn’t need this.

"Visions. Stars and…memories…my memories…Do you see anything?"

"Of course not." Which was when Tess realized her mistake. Because his eyes darkened and she knew suddenly why he’d been asking.

Liz saw things. Of course she did. Why the hell hadn’t Tess lied? One little lie. One little word, and she might have had him…but he was gone now. She could sense it, even if he didn’t yet know what he was going to do. She knew.

"It’s over," she announced.

"What?" Max demanded, the awareness that had been dawning in his face dissapearing, replaced by confusion and worry.

"We’re over Max." Tess cut off his objections before he could start them. "You were with Liz. You just told me that you love her. You stood there and looked me in the eye and told me you love her. Why did you have to do that?"

"I can’t lie to you," Max whispered, disturbed, "I love you too much for that."

"Not enough," Tess corrected him, her voice catching slightly. She ruthlessly squashed the sobs that threatened. "It doesn’t matter. I shouldn’t have asked; you shouldn’t have answered. It’s over."

"Liz and I…nothing happened," Max promised.

"But you wanted it to," Tess accused. He didn’t reply. Silence was answer enough. "Please leave."

"Can’t we talk about this?" Max pleaded.

"No. We can’t. I can’t. Just please Max, go now," Tess pleaded, on the edge of giving in. Of breaking down.

She wanted him to say no, to walk over to the couch and gather her into his arms and tell her that she meant so much more to him, that he could never give her up, never give up what they had together.

He turned and walked to the door, and opened it. And then he looked back at her.

"I’m sorry. Please Tess, don’t leave. We…I…still need you," he said.

Those were his last words. Not that he loved her. Not that he didn’t want to leave. That they needed her. Well, it was something anyway. It would have to be enough.

Tess made it until the door clicked shut before the sobs came. And after that they didn’t stop for a very long time.

Part Seven

"What time is it?" Isabel demanded groggily.

"Seven," Max replied instantly. "I need to talk to you."

"Seven?!" Isabel nearly shrieked. "It’s Saturday!" Max could almost picture her eyes popping open with annoyance. He continued pacing the front room of Michael’s apartment. Finally there was a sigh from Isabel’s end of the phone line. "All right, what is it?"

"Tess broke up with me last night. I need you to find out if she’s okay," Max appealed. There was stunned silence and Max paused in his pacing as Michael entered the room, arching eloquent eyebrows at him.

"She what?" Isabel demanded finally. "This is some kind of joke, isn’t it?"

"I’m afraid not. I…it’s hard to explain Iz. Can you just go see her?" Max asked, concern plain in his voice. Tess had put up a brave front the night before, but he knew her well enough to know it was a façade.

"Why?" Isabel asked in a stunned voice. "Why would she do that? Max, she’s like obsessed with you. She would never—"

"She thinks I want to be with Liz," Max explained, interrupting. Another stunned silence. Michael looked up from his cereal with a rather interested face. Max hadn’t really told him the whole story the night before. It had been four in the morning after all.

"Do you?"

"I don’t know…" Max admitted. "I love them both. But Tess took the decision out of my hands. I’m worried about her."

"I can see why," Isabel murmured. "I’ll go. You really didn’t do this to her?"

"I swear, nothing happened with Liz. And I would do anything not to hurt Tess. But she kicked me out. I just…need to know that she’s okay."

"Of course I’ll go." Isabel paused. "Are you okay?"

"I don’t know," Max admitted again. "I’m either the world’s biggest idiot or the world’s happiest man."

"Go see Liz," Isabel counseled.

"I will. But I had to make sure someone was there for Tess first."

"You’re a good guy," Isabel informed him. Max shook his head, even though she couldn’t see it.

"No I’m not Iz. I’m the worst."

*

"So what the hell did you do?" Michael asked as Max put down the phone.

"I went out for a walk in the middle of the night and ran into Liz. We…kissed." Michael sighed and shook his head. "I know I shouldn’t have. I just couldn’t stay away from her. And then when I went home, Tess was awake. She dumped me."

"I don’t get you Maxwell," Michael commented, stirring his cereal idly.

"I don’t get me," Max agreed. "Thanks for letting me crash here." Michael shrugged.

"Not a problem. Do you want to borrow some clothes?" Michael offered, squinting at the ratty jeans and t-shirt Max had thrown on before he went out the night before.

"That might be a good idea," Max agreed.

"Get something out of the closet," Michael suggested. "You going to see Liz?"

"I don’t know," Max sighed. "I want to. It’s just really complicated."

"What’s so complicated?" Michael asked mildly. "You like her, she likes you. You had a girlfriend, you no longer do. Unless you want Tess back, I’d get moving with Liz. It’s been six years. She might actually get the picture and move on." He snorted. "I would have."

"Right, the way you ‘moved on’ from Maria," Max commented, walking into Michael’s bedroom to look for something to wear.

"Hey!" Michael shouted after him. "That’s got nothing to do with this!"

Max snorted and started going through the closet.

*

Someone was knocking at the door. Why was someone knocking at the door? Tess roused slightly from her miserable half-sleep, sniffling as she looked around the dark living room. All the shades were drawn, so she had no idea what time it was, or how long she’d been laying there.

Was it Max? It could be Max, coming back…

No. Max wouldn’t knock.

Tess slumped back onto the couch and resumed ignoring the sound.

"Tess?" Isabel’s voice called. "It’s me. Can I come in?"

Isabel. Maybe she was here for Max…to reason with her. Or maybe she was just here to confirm that it was over. A fresh sob burst from Tess. How could she even cry anymore? In twenty three years of life she’d never cried until this moment. She hadn’t thought she knew how.

But Max had made her human. He’d made her feel human things. And now he was gone.

Isabel must have heard the cry, because the doorknob glowed for a moment and then the lock clicked open and Isabel entered. She took one look at Tess, curled in a ball on the couch, and then was there in a second, cradling her.

"I’m so sorry," she whispered. Then it was true. Max had told her…and he had told her it was over. Isabel’s hands stroked her hair, comforting and caring, and worried. "I think you did the right thing Tess."

"Right thing?" Tess demanded through her sobs. "There’s a right thing?"

"I don’t know," Isabel murmured. "But I know you’ll be okay. It’ll be all right, I promise."

"I just wanted to be needed," Tess cried, the part of her mind that could still think amazed she was saying all this, she was opening up. She and Isabel had become pretty good friends, but Tess had never liked to discuss her feelings. She didn’t really have them…not the way everyone else seemed to. Maybe because she’d never wanted to be human.

Not until now. Because Max loved a human more. Isabel murmured something soothing and inconsequential, and Tess let herself cry, deep in the knowledge that she knew what it was to be human now, now that it was too late.

*

"Rise and shine Depresso Gal," Maria said blithely, pulling off Liz’s quilt.

"Noooo," Liz moaned, turning over and burying her face in her pillow. She spared a half-awake thought to be glad that Future Max had opted to prowl the town rather than come home with her.

"Does she want pancakes?" Serena asked, peeking her head through the door.

"It’s Saturday!" Liz remembered, flopping onto her back to regard Maria with horror. "What are you doing?"

"Serena’s making pancakes," Maria informed her. "And then we’re going to the salon for a day of therapeutical preening. On me."

"That’s very nice Maria," Liz managed. "But we didn’t get home until almost two. And I coul—"

"No excuses," Maria cut her off, shaking her head. "It’s nine. That’s plenty of sleep. Now get up, and get ready to be beautiful."

"I’ll do my best," Liz gritted, glaring. Maria gave her a triumphant smile.

"Do you want pancakes?" Serena asked again.

"Go away," Liz muttered, and turned back onto her stomach. Serena laughed.

"I’ll take that as a yes," she said. "You have fifteen minutes to come get them." Liz threw a pillow at the door, and missed. Badly.

*

"Knock," Max muttered under his breath. "Just knock. You can do it." He drew one hand out of his pocket and raised it to the door, then paused, lowering it again. Maybe he should just leave. Liz didn’t need to see him right now. She was probably still asleep…And even if she wasn’t, he should probably give her a day or two, just to let her sort things out…Max nodded at the reasoning and turned to leave, then paused and turned back. He really should talk to her.

"I’m gonna get the pa—" Max heard through the door, and before he could move to duck out of the way, the door to the apartment opened and Maria stood before him in her pajamas.

"Hi," Max said lamely. Beyond Maria, someone stood up at the table and he realized it was Liz. Liz was awake and right there…Right there.

"Max!" Maria exclaimed brightly. "You want to talk to Liz of course. She’s right there. I’m going to get the paper." She grabbed him, pulled him into the apartment, and shoved him towards Liz before walking out and closing the door behind her. Liz was half-standing at the table, Serena seated beside her with a large stack of pancakes.

"Sorry to intrude," Max said awkwardly.

"No, no, it’s fine," Serena assured him quickly. "I’ll just…go get dressed." She gave Liz a significant look and then escaped to her bedroom, leaving Liz and Max alone.

"Pancakes?" Liz asked faintly. Max shook his head.

"I already ate. At Michael’s. Tess…broke up with me last night." He dared a glance up to see her reaction. Her face was pale with shock, and something akin to relief, mixed with hope shone in her eyes. That was quickly replaced with sympathy.

"I’m so sorry," she murmured.

"Are you really?" Max asked. Slowly Liz shook her head. Max nodded, understanding. "I told her the truth, and she told me it was over."

"What truth?" Liz asked carefully.

"That I’m in love with you," Max replied frankly, meeting her eyes.

"Oh."

Max was tired of watching her from eight feet away. He walked swiftly over and took her hands. "Liz, I know we’ve been apart for six years, and a lot has happened in that time. But I told you once that you were the one for me, and it’s still true. It’s always been true. Do you think you can give me another chance?"

Liz raised her eyes slowly to his, and smiled shyly. "You never had to ask," she informed him. Before Max could react, there was a shriek from outside the door and Liz and Max laughed incredulously, walking over to the door and opening it to find Maria standing just outside grinning broadly.

"I’m so happy for you guys!" she exclaimed, hugging them both at the same time. "I can have a vicarious love life again!" Max let himself smile, even though he knew it wasn’t over, that everything wasn’t perfect now, just because. There was still Tess. And he did love her, in a way. It was just…different.

"Maria…" Liz managed finally. Maria paused and looked from Liz to Max and back again.

"Right. Going now…" She walked past them and into her room. Liz and Max waited until the door had clicked shut, then turned back to each other, serious again.

"I’m sorry about everything Max. I know I complicated things," Liz apologized.

"It doesn’t matter," Max promised. "We’re together now. Nothing else matters." He bent to kiss her, gently, with all the pent-up need of six long years. When she pulled away it was only to tighten her arms around his neck and bury her face in his chest, whispering, "I hope you’re right."

She wondered if there were two Maxes in this world still, or if for once she could just be happy.

Part Eight

"Drink," Isabel ordered, securing Tess’s hands around a mug of tea. Obediently, Tess raised the cup to her lips and sipped. Isabel settled back down beside her on the couch. "Now, what would make you feel better?"

"Better?" Tess asked, arching her eyebrows sarcastically. "How about Liz Parker mysteriously dissapearing from the face of the Earth?" Not that that would actually help…but it might make her feel just the tiniest bit happier.

"Let’s go to the salon," Isabel suggested. "We can have massages, and get our hair done, and our nails…"

"Or we could sit here," Tess replied.

"Or we could sit here," Isabel sighed. "You can’t just stay here forever Tess."

"Why not? It’s not like there’s anyone that will miss me."

"I will miss you!" Isabel exclaimed. "And so will Michael, and Serena, and Alex…Max is not the only person on this planet that cares about you."

"Maybe I’ll just leave," Tess murmured, hardly hearing what Isabel was saying, lost in her Max-less reverie. "Get out of Roswell."

"You can’t leave," Isabel pleaded, her eyes filling with tears. Tess didn’t even glance her direction.

"Maybe he’d be sorry then. Maybe he’d miss me."

"Tess!" Isabel exclaimed, finally grabbing her friend and pulling her head around. Tess blinked at her, as if she’d forgotten she was there. "You can’t leave. We need you. We all need you."

"For what?" Tess demanded.

"You’re my best friend," Isabel replied. "You’re the only really close girlfriend I’ve ever had. You’re like my sister. And we’re a unit, the four of us. We need you."

"I would have been your sister," Tess said cooly. Isabel bit her lip and tucked a piece of her hair back.

"You still are. You’ll always be my sister, even if you and Max aren’t together. Please, don’t leave," Isabel appealed. Tess swallowed, and set the tea mug down carefully, then hugged Isabel.

"I won’t, I promise."

"Thank you."

And Tess made a promise to herself too: no matter what Max thought, what Max did, she would make him need her. She would give him what no one else could: power. She would give him the granolith, and then they would all need her.

*

"Staying at Michael’s?" Liz asked, straightening Max’s jacket.

"Mhmm. If you need me, call my cell phone. Any time, day or night," Max told her firmly. Liz nodded, releasing his clothing and stepping back, crossing her arms over her stomach.

"I’ll be fine," Liz said. "I’m fine."

"Are you sure?" Max asked gently. Liz nodded, a slight smile tugging at her lips.

"Hey, I’m the one getting the good part of this deal. I feel worse for…" She trailed off. Max nodded, understanding.

"Me too. But there’s nothing we can do."

"If there was…would you?" Liz asked suddenly, knowing she should stop. Knowing she shouldn’t bring out doubts. He was where she wanted him to be, where the world needed him to be. She shouldn’t question that…Except she had to. Because as a woman who loved him, she had to know if he was where he wanted him to be. "Would you go back to Tess if she’d take you?"

Max captured her hands, his eyes dark. "Liz, we went over this. I love Tess, but now the way I love you. I’m sorry that I hurt her, I will always be sorry for that. But if I’d never found out the truth, if I’d lived the rest of my life with her, I would have been sorry. Because you’re my destiny."

Liz was surprised to find she had tears in her eyes…or maybe not so surprised. She couldn’t even find words, she just kept gazing up at him, drinking in the sight of his face. He bent to kiss her, sweet and soft and full of bright night skies.

"Go to bed," she whispered when he pulled away. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight," Max said softly, pulling away as if reluctant and heading towards the door. She leaned against the wall and watched him go, unable to stop a small smile from stealing across her face as he kept looking back, as if he didn’t want to leave. She didn’t want him to leave. But it had been six years, and too fast was too fast.

Humming slightly, Liz walked toward her room after Max dissapeared out the door. Maria and Serena were at a movie. Liz opened the door, switching on her light and slipping into her room—and stopped cold, frozen at the sight of another Max sitting on her bed.

"How did you…?"

"I climbed in through the window," he replied. Liz glanced at it, startled, and then looked back.

"But Max and Tess—I thought you were gone—" He shook his head.

"I saw Isabel with Tess. I—the other me—left her?"

"No, Tess broke up with Max. But he’s here now, with me…I mean, he isn’t now, he went home, but we’re together…So it didn’t work. Tess is still going to betray us." Max nodded soberly.

"I’m sorry. We have to try something else."

"We have to make her not want to go. We took away Max as a reason…"

"So we need to take away the need for it at all," Future Max finished. Liz looked up, startled, and nodded.

"Exactly. But…how?"

"I know how to access the granolith. I have the information that Tess is trying to get. I can tell you…"

"But no one will believe me. I have no explanation for how I would know," Liz sighed. "You could go to Michael or Isabel."

"They’d want to know why I came back. They’d demand and explanation and…I couldn’t give them one," Max pointed out. Liz nodded, sitting down on the bed beside him.

"We could…" she began, then trailed off, shaking her head, falling into silence. An idea dawned slowly and she sat up more, turning to him. "I know what we can do."

"What?" Max asked.

"When I kissed…you…in the park the other night, I saw a flash of the granolith. Remember when our kissing lead us to the ord? Well, what if I said I’d seen how to use the granolith, while I was kissing you…I could give you—the you of this time—all the information you need," Liz suggested. Max thought about it for a moment, and began nodding.

"I think that would work…except there’s too much to be told. Using the granolith isn’t exactly simple. You could never see it all in just a kiss."

Liz paused, and silence settled between them again, cool and waiting. Slowly, she raised her eyes from her quilt, up Max’s leather vest, and into his dark eyes. "What if it was more than a kiss?"

"Can you do that?" Max asked gently.

"Six years ago, I was supposed to make love to you. But you—another you—came back and told me I couldn’t. He took away my life, the way it was supposed to be. And now you’re here, and I think you’re giving it back. It scares me a little, but I have to take the chance. If I could give up my life for the world, I have to be able to take it back."

There was a long moment of silence, as they searched each other’s eyes. "I don’t think I ever realized just how much I lost," Max said finally, from four years in the future and a different world.

"How much we lost," Liz corrected him. "I just hope we don’t lose it again."

"Hope isn’t a strong enough word."

*

Ringing. Max startled awake from a dream of Liz to the quiet ringing of his cell phone. It was right by his head, on low so it wouldn’t wake Michael. He sat up and hit the on button. "Hello?"

"Come outside," Liz’s voice beckoned him, and for a second he thought he was still dreaming.

"Are you okay?" he demanded.

"I need you Max. I’m outside, please come." Max ran a hand through his hair and slid off the couch, walking over to the window. He peeked out and sure enough, Liz was standing on the street, just below the window, gazing up at him with the stars in her eyes.

"I’m coming," he promised.

"Hurry," she whispered, and hung up. Chilled by her tone, Max quickly pulled on a pair of pants and a shirt—Isabel had brought his clothes—leaving his jacket draped over a chair in his hurry. In moments he was down the stairs and emerging from the apartment building, into the warm night air. She was standing there in slip dress, her eyes wide and her hair tangled about her face.

"Are you oka—" he began to ask when he was within hearing range. Before he could finish his sentence she was in his arms, her mouth devouring his, desperate and heated. Thought left Max’s mind as he responded, all the need and desire of the last six—seven, really—years surfacing in a rush. He couldn’t get enough of her mouth, the smell of her, the silk of her dress, so thin, so close to her skin…

"Max," she murmured, pulling away for a breather. "I don’t want to spend another night alone."

He paused, some semblance of sanity coming back to his mind as he waged a war between desire and concern. "Are you sure?" he asked, pulling away just far enough that he could see her face in it’s entirety. Her eyes, in which he would happily drown…her lips, swollen from kisses, begging to be touched…the curve of her cheek, her throat…He swallowed back a moan.

"I am absolutely sure," Liz said, nodding, her eyes sober. "I want this Max. I’ve been waiting a long time."

"I know the feeling," Max half-whispered, half-laughed, a giddy mix of joy, and wonder swirling through his mind. He glanced around them. "Where…?"

"I have a place," Liz promised, slipping her hand down to twine it through his before she got back on her tiptoes to kiss his tenderly. He ached with the promise in the kiss—a promise of love, of more, of an entire world suddenly opening to his view. "Come with me."

"Anywhere."

Part Nine

The darkness was like velvet, like the soft whisper of a hand brushing skin, the wonder of a voice, murmuring. Hands touched, melted apart, lips met flesh, the soft beating of a pulse, the smooth curve of a throat.

Galaxies swam, twisting through space, rushing toward some point, infinite and important.

A laugh, a sigh, twisting to fit together, and a world awoken, lost for so long. Shadows settled into the crooks of arms, the hollows of cheeks, into eyes filled with brightness. Words so long unsaid echoed in a movement, a brush of a fingertip.

Power, pulsing and sudden, enveloping them within it’s light. Knowledge, piercing through shrouds of confusion, suddenly so clear, so bright. Power, within her reach.

Laughter melted away, replaced with need, deep and intense beyond words, beyond the sparkling of eyes. They met in shared desire, in loss, and in love, and learned for the first time what destiny truly was.

*

"Are you all right?" Max asked, cradling Liz closer. She looked up from her contemplation of his chest, a startled smile flying to her lips as she met his eyes, her fingers tracing the broad expanse of his shoulder, unable to stop touching him.

"I’m fine," she assured him. "I’m…I don’t even know how to say it." She took a deep breath, and knew she’d have to say it. Well, she’d have to say something. "Max, I saw things."

"What things?" Max asked curiously, propping himself up on one elbow. Liz settled on her back to gaze up at him, at the ceiling of the hotel room.

"The granolith," she replied, going over what the other Max had told her, what she’d need to say. And what she had really seen, which was definitely going to confuse issues. It was already confusing her.

What did it mean that she’d actually seen the very thing she was supposed to tell Max about? Had it just been her own mind, taking the knowledge she’d already had and creating a vision so she wouldn’t feel bad about lying? Had she imagined it? A…wishful thinking kind of thing?

No, it had been real. It had been from Max. This Max. Her Max.

"What about the granolith?" Max asked, sounding slightly defensive. Poor boy. She knew everyone had been hounding him about getting information from the Skins—leading to Tess’s betrayal which would be…the next day? No, the day after. If they didn’t stop it.

"I think I saw how to use it," Liz replied, meeting his eyes. He blinked, surprised, and watched her carefully, as if she was a dream about to dissapear.

"What did you see?"

"It’s hard to explain," Liz said, which was entirely truthful. It had been difficult for the other Max to tell her about it—now that she’d had her own vision, she had a clearer idea of what she needed to tell this Max…but she still didn’t know how to say it. "I could show you."

"You know how important this could be…" Max said. Liz nodded.

"I know. Do you want to go now?" Max glanced at the door of the room, reluctance written in every line of his body. She knew the feeling. If she’d had her way she would stay her forever, just lying here with him. She wanted to sleep with him curled around her…but there would be other nights.

"There’ll be other nights," she promised.

"You’re right," Max said, nodding. "As long as you don’t mind that much…we should go now."

"It’s all right," Liz affirmed, sitting up, blushing a little as she contemplated getting out of bed and getting over to her hastily discarded clothing. They’d come into the room already in the heat of the moment, and she hadn’t had time or inclination to be embarrased. But now he was just sitting there, watching her…And she *really* wasn’t used to this…

A smile crooked Max’s lip as he recognized her dilemma.

"Well we’re going to have to sometime…" Liz pointed out.

"I’ll go first," Max offered. On impulse she leaned over to kiss him, giggling a little at the utter ridiculousness of the situation. They’d been kept apart for six years, loving each other. They’d finally made love, and they were now going to try and save the world…and they were both embarassed to be seen naked by the other.

Max slid out of bed and Liz wished desperately that they didn’t have to go. To supress her own reaction, she averted her eyes and threw off the covers, creeping over to her clothes and pulling on her underwear and the slip dress she’d put on. When she turned back, Max was watching her, fully dressed.

"Shall we…go?" Liz asked, gesturing towards the door. Max blinked, as if his mind had been a thousand miles away. His eyes were dark, drinking her in, and slowly coming back to reality.

"Right. Go. Let’s…go." Liz nodded, and didn’t move. With a lump in her throat, she reached out to him, and he came, taking her hand in his, warm and comforting and there. With her.

"You are the most beautiful, amazing woman I know," Max said softly, pulling her closet yet, into the circle of his arms.

"Do you think the fact that I saw the granolith means something?" Liz asked, gazing up at him, one hand involuntarily tracing the curve of his chin.

"I think it means you were meant for me," Max murmured.

"And I was meant for you," Liz finished, grinning involuntarily. "Jewel song. Anyway…" She shook her head, unable to stop smiling up at him. "You really think that?"

"What else is there to think?" Max asked. "If you really know how to use the granolith, then you may be saving all our lives. If that isn’t destiny, I don’t know what is."

"We should go," Liz whispered up at him, through her smile and the tears springing to her eyes.

"Let’s go," Max agreed. "We have the room until noon." Liz smiled brilliantly up at him and pulled his mouth down for a quick kiss before escaping to the door, knowing he would follow.

*

The room was humming, and to Liz’s eyes the granolith was shining with an unusual brightness. But then she felt as if she were shining, so she was a bit biased. Max’s hand was tight around her as they entered the small chamber, and her entire body was sensitized to his touch.

We become inseparable, and nothing comes between us ever again, until... Liz remembered his words so well. He—the first Future Max—had been talking about them making love. And now they had, and Liz knew exactly what he meant. And she also knew that even if the world depended on it, she could never turn Max away again. She would die first.

"And maybe I will," Liz whispered silently.

"What?" Max asked.

"Nothing…it seems brighter. Does it seem brighter to you?" Liz asked, turning the conversation immediately.

"Yes." Max put his hand on the granolith and it brightened yet further. Liz felt a surge run through her, from Max’s hand in hers. "What do I do?"

"Down here," Liz said, bending without releasing his hands and putting her hands on the base of the granolith. Beneath her touch it moved, sliding open to reveal slotted openings. Max squatted beside her, running his hand over them.

"What are they for?"

"Crystals," Liz said, the image flashing through her mind again…crystals, different colors, sizes and shapes, each with a meaning. A…meaning? She frowned, trying to sort out what that meant. The other Max had told her that different crystals called on different powers. Her flashes indicated it was deeper than that.

"What kind of crystals?" Max asked. Liz turned to him, cocking her head, and something on the side of the room caught her eye. In the bottom of the wall there was a seam…as if it was a hidden door. But she knew it hadn’t been there before…Future Max hadn’t told her about this.

"Here," Liz said suddenly, walking over to the edge of the room and kneeling down beside the door. She beckoned him with her and placed his hand on the crack in the wall. Slowly a panel in the wall slid open to reveal racks full of crystals of different sizes and colors. "These." In the other future, the one that hadn’t yet been ruled out, Tess had brought crystals back from her deal with the Skins. The future Max hadn’t known about all of these. He’d been able to give Liz a muddled explanation of how to make crystals but this…was much better…

"You just…put them in?" Max asked, picking up a slender blue one curiously. He froze the moment his hand touched it, and put it down quickly.

"What is it?" Liz asked, though she had a feeling she already knew. The future Max had told her this Max would know what to do with the crystals once he made them.

"It made me see flames," Max replied quietly, looking disturbed. He touched another one, a clear one, and his brow furrowed as he picked it up, weighing it in his hands.

"What is it?" Liz asked.

"I think it’s my mother…" Before Liz could react he walked over to the granolith and inserted the crystal unerringly into one of the holes. Liz stood, one hand outstretched slightly toward him. There was a moment as her heart hovered in her throat and then the granolith glowed brighter…so bright she had to hide her eyes. When she looked back up, the same woman she’d seen seven years before in the front cave was hovering inside the granolith, watching Max.

"You have found me," she said, smiling slightly. "Hello Max."

Part Ten

"You’ve got to stop waking me up Max," Isabel said irritably. "I was up until like two last night trying to get your ex-girlfriend to be less hysterical."

"This is important Iz," Max replied, then paused, distracted. "How is Tess?" He glanced over at Liz, who was sitting on the couch of the Crashdown’s back room, watching him uneasily.

"She’ll be all right," Isabel replied. "She’s just…really hurting. But she’s asleep now. Anyway, what’s so important? Were you calling for me or for her?"

"Both," Max replied. "I found out how to access the granolith."

"What? How?" Isabel demanded.

"It’s a long story. But I…we can talk to our mother Iz. She can talk back. She told me all about the granolith and how to use it. I’m at the Crashdown right now. I need you and Tess to come down here. Michael’s on his way."

"How about we meet you guys at the cave?" Isabel suggested. "It’s gonna take us a little while."

"That’s fine. If you don’t think Tess is up to it…" Max tried, but Isabel cut him off.

"No, she’ll be glad to come. She wants to be useful. I’ll see you there."

"All right." Max paused, looking over at Liz now. She was conspicuously giving him space, picking at the fabric of the couch. She’d changed into clean clothes that she kept upstairs and pinned her hair up. Memories invaded his mind of it down, long and flowing over the skin of her neck…her throat…the curve of her shoulder… "Liz is coming," he said into the phone, earning a look from his girlfriend. "I’m going to get Serena down too, see if she can understand the technical aspects."

"Thanks for the warning," Isabel said softly.

"Thank you," Max replied. "Bye." She said goodbye and hung up and Max did the same, turning to Liz, who looked about to protest. He forestalled her with a raised hand. "You were the one that discovered how to access it. You found the crystals. You deserve a place in this as much as anyone."

"I don’t want to make things worse with Tess," Liz said, something unsaid lurking behind her eyes.

"I know," he said, though he didn’t think he did. Not everything. There were things Liz wasn’t saying. The terror that he sometimes saw in her eyes wasn’t just because she didn’t want to hurt anyone. There was more, something worse. He wasn’t going to push though. He was too happy to have her there, with him again.

"Your mother was…" Liz began, and trailed off.

"Right," Max finished. "She was right." He sat beside her on the couch and captured her hands. "She said that you were the key, my key, and she was right."

"I thought she would hate me for coming between you and Tess," Liz said softly, a slight smile ghosting over her lips.

"You led me to her," Max reminded her. "How could she hate you?" Liz met his eyes, and smiled, sweetly, at the love there, the memories of what that night had given them.

"You should call Serena," she reminded him. "I’m going to run upstairs and get my other clothes to put in your trunk." Max agreed, kissing her softly before he released her. He watched until she dissapeared up the steps, remembering the last time he had watched her walk that way. What was it? Three days ago? Four? So little time…and so much had happened. He felt like he was in a whole new world. Maybe he was.

*

"Hey." Liz jumped about a foot, spinning around to see Future Max sitting on her old window sill.

"You’re still here."

"Did it work?" he asked, something in his eyes needing the answer to be yes. Liz nodded.

"Max believed me. And I…I actually saw things," she admitted, glancing up to see what his reaction would be. He looked stunned, and sad.

"I wish this was over," he whispered. "So the only world left would be this one, the one we’re making now." Liz walked over to him, touching his hand gently.

"Thank you," she said.

"You did it. The granolith…he accessed it?" Liz nodded again.

"There were crystals hidden in the side of the room. We spoke to your mother."

"You did?" Max demanded, startled. "How?"

"One of the crystals had…part of her…that’s what she said. When we put it in, the granolith gave that part enough power so she could interact with us as if she were really there. She told us how to make more crystals and…other things. You never saw her?" Liz asked.

"No. Tess brought us crystals with information, but never people. I didn’t even know it was possible. That I could see my mother again." Pain crossed his face, fleeting and then gone in an instant. "We never knew there were crystals already in the room. You…saw that?"

"The hidden door opened when you and I went in," Liz explained.

"Have you told Tess?"

"We just called Isabel, she’s bringing Tess to meet us there."

"That’s probably why I’m still here. Hopefully I’ll be gone by tonight. I’m going to follow Tess anyway, until I can’t. Just in case."

"What will you do if she tries to go to the Skins?" Liz asked, her hand brushing his again. He looked up, his face inches from her, his eyes very dark.

"I’ll kill her."

"We couldn’t make more crystals then," Liz pointed out.

"Anything is better than the life I lived," Max whispered, his voice harsh and pained. Liz squeezed his hand quickly.

"I have to go. You—the other you—I have to go..." He nodded his understanding.

"Good luck."

"You too," Liz replied, and fled from the future she prayed would never be.

*

"Where are you going?" Maria demanded sleepily, padding out of her room to find Serena slipping her boots on.

"Granolith," she explained quickly. "Max found a way to access it. He wants me to come down and see if I can figure out what he’s doing."

"Does Liz know?" Maria asked, immediately awake.

"Liz is with him," Serena explained. Maria’s eyes widened and her mouth formed an ‘O’ which immediately transformed into a grin.

"Not wasting any time, are they?" she demanded. A smile stole across Serena’s face as well.

"I’m happy for them. I just…worry about Tess."

"Pfft," Maria dismissed it. "She’s better off without him. A woman without a man is like a fish without a bicycle."

"So why is it you always want to ride?" Serena asked slyly. "You know, I’ve heard there’s this great brand of bicycle…what’s it called? Something like…Michael maybe…?"

Maria grabbed a pillow from the couch and lobbed it at her friend’s head, but Serena ducked, laughing. "God, it’s over!" Maria fumed.

"Right…" Serena agreed, her eyes twinkling as she stood up and grabbed her jacket. "Word of advice: learn how to swim before you start with the fish metaphors."

"I do not need Michael!" Maria exclaimed, grabbing another pillow. Serena escaped towards the door, laughing. "I don’t even like him!" Maria yelled after her. Serena pulled the door open and started through. "Come back and tell me all about it!" Serena waved a consenting hand before the door closed behind her. Maria sighed and slumped on the couch. "Who needs a bicycle?" she muttered, and threw another pillow just for good riddance.

*

The night before, she’d clung to the one thing she had left—the ability to help. To make a difference. To give Max the one thing he needed more than love: power.

And he’d found it himself. He’d found the key to the granolith himself.

"Are you ready?" Isabel asked with a quick smile. "Isn’t this amazing?"

"I can’t believe it," Tess replied, even though the part she couldn’t believe was that this was happening at all. The one thing she’d had left…and it was gone now. Maybe. Maybe it wasn’t. She clung to that hope…maybe he didn’t really know how to use it. Maybe her information would still be needed. "Let’s go."

"I’ll drive," Isabel volunteered as they left the house. The house that Tess had shared with Max. Tess gave her a wan smile, distracted by memories and hurt.

And then by a thought. "It’s just the four of us, right?" she asked, climbing into the passenger’s seat of Isabel’s car. There was no reply, and Tess looked up expectantly as Isabel sat in the driver’s seat and buckled her seat belt, an uneasy expression on her face. Tess felt a chill. "It’s not?"

"Max said he was going to call Serena," Isabel replied. "He wants to see if she understands what’s going on."

"But that’s it? Just us and Serena?" Tess asked, though from the look on Isabel’s face, the answer wasn’t the one she wanted. Serena Tess could handle. She even liked Serena, they were good friends. But anyone else…especially one person…

"I think Liz might be coming too," Isabel admitted reluctantly.

Tess closed her eyes and leaned back in her seat as Isabel started the car and turned out of the driveway. No. She couldn’t take this. Couldn’t take seeing them together, already. And there was no doubt in her mind they would be together. Six years apart, and she doubted it had taken them an hour after Tess threw Max out.

"I’ll be there," Isabel promised. "And lots of other people. You won’t have to talk to her or…anything…"

"It’s not the talking," Tess whispered. "It’s the knowing she’s alive at all." Isabel shut up, and Tess stared out the window at the morning that had absolutely no right to be so beautiful.

Part Eleven

"What did you do to it Maxwell?" Michael demanded, half-teasing as he walked in the door.

"It wasn’t me," Max replied, looking up at the brilliantly glowing granolith. "It was like that when Liz and I came this morning."

"So what’s the big secret?" Michael asked. "How does it work?"

"I’ll tell you when everyone else gets here," Max promised. "It’ll be easier to tell everyone at once." Michael nodded, slanting a glance at Liz, who was quiet and pale, clinging to Max’s hand.

"Hey," he said. She summoned a smile.

"Hi Michael."

"Is Isabel brin—" Michael’s question was cut off by Serena’s head peeking through the entrance. She stooped to come the rest of the way in, then straightened once she was in the chamber, running a hand through her hair.

"Hi!" she greeted them cheerily, her gaze going straight to Liz and Max. "I can’t wait to hear this explanation."

Liz blushed. Max blushed. Michael cocked an eyebrow at them.

Isabel’s voice from the outer cave interrupted the silence that threatened to settle over them. "We’re here," she called, stooping into the granolith cave, one hand pulling Tess in behind her. "Are we late?"

"The rest of us were early," Serena assured her. Tess emerged, a careful non-expression on her face. Her eyes darted around the room, taking in Max and Liz’s linked hands and darting quickly away.

"So, why don’t we get started," Isabel said brightly, obviously trying to take everyone’s mind off what had been happening. Liz released Max’s hand and conspicuously stepped away from him, though his pained look as she did so ruined the effect.

"It’s crystals," Max explained. He lifted one of them—the one with his and Isabel’s mother. "They contain information or…instructions. When you put them into the granolith, they turn the power into usable forms, like…spells."

"How do we talk to our mother?" Isabel asked. Max lifted the crystal he was holding and passed it to her. She blinked and nearly dropped it, startled at the images it evoked. "This is her."

"Part of her. When that crystal is put into the granolith, the power makes her…almost alive. She can talk to us, see us. But she said it would only work a limited amount of times, so we should only use it when we need it," Max explained. Isabel nodded, obviously dissapointed but understanding. She passed the crystal to Tess, who held it for a second and then gave it to Serena. The physics major began to examine it with interest.

"Where did you find this?" Serena asked. "And how did you find out how to use it?" Liz and Max turned as one, to give Tess uneasy glances. She straightened further and they looked quickly away.

"Liz saw it," Max explained quietly. "She had a flash…"

"A flash?" Serena asked, her scientific curiousity overcoming her sensitivity towards Tess’s feelings.

"When we’re together, Liz can…see things. Visions. Of my memories," Max said shortly, trying to get this over with as quickly as possible. Tess was paling more by the second. "That’s how we found the first orb."

"And she saw the crystals?" Michael asked.

"She saw that they would be needed…when we came here, the door to the crystals was glowing, and it opened for us."

"So Liz gave you the answers?" Tess asked quietly. "Liz gave you the granolith."

Max opened his mouth to deny it, to say something, but nothing came out. And in a second, without waiting for an answer, Tess had fled the chamber. Max started after her but Isabel but a hand on his chest.

"She just needs a little time," she said softly. "She really wanted…to help you." Her gaze wandered to the door through which Tess had dissapeared. "She’ll be all right," she murmured, but no one in the room, even Isabel, knew if she really meant it.

*

No. No. No. No. This wasn’t possible. It wasn’t happening. It couldn’t be happening.

Liz gave it to him. Liz gave him everything.

It was Liz he loved.

It was Liz who saw his inner thoughts.

It was Liz that gave him power.

And Tess wasn’t needed at all, wasn’t loved. She was nothing. Nothing to Max anyway. And why should she be? What had she ever done for him? This was her chance to prove herself. To show that she was important, that she could give him the world. Give him victory.

But Liz did it instead.

No. No. No. No. God no.

Not that Tess believed in God. Not the human one anyway. Why should she? God made Adam and Eve. He made all the animals and the world. But did he make her? Where was the story of her race? What had God done for her?

God made Liz Parker. If He even existed at all…which she didn’t believe…and her head hurt. It really hurt. This couldn’t be happening. Any minute now she was sure to wake up, with Max lying right there, trusting and childlike, and know it was all a terrible nightmare. That’s all it was. A nightmare.

Tess couldn’t even make it to the mouth of the cave. She crumpled to the hard stone floor and sobbed.

*

"Someone has to go talk to her," Serena said finally.

"We can’t make the crystals without her," Michael agreed, looking worried and uncomfortable.

Isabel and Max opened their mouths at the same time, but Liz got there first. "I’ll go," she said, and slipped out of the cave before they could stop her. Watching Tess run out of there…well, she knew what it was like to be hurt. And she knew what she would do in this situation. Except Tess couldn’t. Tess absolutely couldn’t.

The outer cave was bright and sunny, and it took Liz a long moment to spy Tess, who was sitting with her knees drawn up near the cave door, staring out into the desert. She didn’t look up.

"I know you don’t want to talk to me right now," Liz said after a moment. "But please just listen?"

Tess’s face hardened at hearing her voice. "Go away." Liz shook her head, kneeling down opposite Tess.

"I know you probably hate me. I would hate me. But I promise Tess, there are reasons. I’m sorry…"

"Reasons?" Tess inquired bitterly. "Oh, I understand. You couldn’t keep your hands off him anymore."

Liz biit her lips and stared down at the cave ground for a minute. "What are you going to do?" she asked finally.

"Leave," Tess replied easily. Liz’s head shot up. That was the answer she most definitely did not want to hear.

"You can’t leave," she blurted out.

"Sure I can. I get a bus ticket, a bag of clothes and I get out of this hell hole. It’s not like anyone will miss me."

"That’s a lie," Liz accused.

"What do you know about it?"

"I know Max will miss you. He cares about you a lot. You’re his family. And you’re Isabel’s best friend, she’d be devastated if you left. So would Michael, even if he never shows it. And Serena. And Kyle."

"Glad you’re not trying to tell me you would miss me."

"You’re right, I wouldn’t. But there’s more at stake here than what I want."

"Really?" Tess asked nastily. "I didn’t notice." Liz supressed the urge to snap back.

"Look Tess, this isn’t going to be easy, but you have to stay. The crystals…the granolith…it can’t be worked without you. They need you to create more crystals, and you’ll need more. Without you the granolith…knowing how to use it…it’s no good at all."

Tess’s head moved imperceptibly, but she didn’t say anything.

"I’m not needed. Not really. I only helped Max discover what he already knew. But they can’t do anything without you. If you leave now, it will be the most selfish thing anyone has ever done. You will be condemning Max and Isabel and Michael and the entire world," Liz said steadily, using all the arguments on Tess that she had used on herself a thousand times in the last six years.

"Please go away," Tess whispered. Liz clasped her hands together very tightly, and finally nodded.

"Please stay," she murmured, standing up. "For Max if not for the world. Stay for Max." And then she fled for the comfort of warm arms and a man that loved her, no matter what happened. She’d done all she could. Now everything was left to destiny.

Part Twelve

On a bright New Mexico day, children played in the park. A mother rocked a baby to sleep. Families attended church together; husbands and wived held hands in the pews. Teenagers shopped, and complained about their homework, and danced down the sidewalks laughing.

Friends worried, and plotted and tried to find a way to save the world.

Alone, scared and cold despite the sun, a woman was torn between love and hate, friendship and pain, and cried over the destiny she’d lost, the fate she didn’t know how to find.

One man watched her, silent and hidden, with dark eyes, and a tired, pained heart. A man that loved her, and would kill her in a moment. A man that had seen the end of sunny Roswell days, of parks and dancing teenagers and church services. A man that had seen the end of friends, and plots, and the woman who sat before him and cried.

It was out of his hands now. But not out of his heart.

*

"Look, I don’t know about you non-humans, but I’m not gonna make it much longer. My brain is about ready to explode. And I *like* this stuff," Serena remarked, rubbing at her eyes.

"Serena’s right," Max agreed. "Enough is enough for one day. We’ve gotten a lot done."

"We’ve gotten nothing done," Michael replied with a snort. "But we sure have talked a lot."

"Michael…" Max gave him a warning look.

"Maxwell…" Michael replied, standing up and stretching. He offered a hand to Isabel, who let him pull her to her feet. Max helped Liz and then Serena up and they stood around the granolith chamber, rubbing at sore necks. They’d been there for upwards of eight hours, with a short break for food. Tess had dissapeared. Liz couldn’t even express in words how nervous that made her.

"I’ll call you all tomorrow?" Max suggested.

"Sure," Isabel agreed. "I’m gonna…" Max nodded quickly, knowing she meant she would look for Tess.

"If you need help…"

"Thanks. I got it." She glanced at Michael, who nodded.

"I’m in. Have a good night."

"I’m gonna head home," Serena said. "I have homework." Her eyes alighted on Liz. "See you later?" Her roommate nodded quickly, with a slight blush as Max’s hand curled around hers. One by one Isabel, Michael and Serena drifted out of the cave, leaving Max and Liz alone.

"What did you say to Tess?" he asked quietly.

"That she couldn’t leave. That everyone needed her," Liz replied.

"I need you too you know," Max said, turning to her. "I always needed you."

She wasn’t sure if she believed him, but the second he slipped his arms around her the glow of the granolith brightened, and there was no denying that. Liz gazed up at him, at the man she’d always loved, the man she’d given up for good until he walked right back into her life three days before. Was it only three days? It felt like a lifetime.

"I know," she murmured in reply. His lips turned up slightly into a smile.

"I guess we missed the twelve ‘o clock check out time, huh?"

"We didn’t turn in the key!" Liz realized, one hand flying to her mouth. "They’ll charge us for another day anyway…" She looked up slowly, realizing what she was saying, and saw the needy glint in his eyes.

"We don’t want to waste our money…" he murmured. Her head shook without her conscious thought.

"We sure wouldn’t," she agreed.

"Maybe we should go over there…just so we don’t waste…"

"Chinese take out?" Liz suggested.

"As long as it’s quick," Max half-purred, leaning down to capture her lips. Liz twined her arms around his neck and yielded to the desire she’d denied for so long.

*

Tess had been waiting for the moonlight, but there wasn’t any moon that night after all. Just stars. She sat on the park bench, her knees drawn up, in the starlight and wondered why she, an alien, was afraid of the dark.

She should love the stars, she knew she should. One of them was hers. Her home. But every time she looked up at them, all she could see was how unbelievably vast space was, and how tiny she was compared to it. She was nothing.

But for some reason, she’d always thought Max was everything.

Looking back on the past six years, she could see the signs. He’d never really loved her. Oh, he probably did care about her. As a friend at least, a family member even. But he’d never looked at her with his eyes shining, the way he looked at Liz Parker. She’d never seen it, and now, looking back, it was the most obvious thing in the world. She just hadn’t wanted to see. And now her eyes had been forced up, and she was blinking and blinded by the truth.

Tess wanted to run. Far, fast: anywhere. Out of this town, with all it’s memories. Out of this state, it’s deserts and it’s destiny. Out of this country. Out of this world. Away from Max. Somewhere she could start over, somewhere she wouldn’t have to watch him not loving her. Somewhere where maybe someone would need her.

But know her? Understand her? Never.

And then there was the granolith. Tess hadn’t had the strength to go back in and ask if what Liz said was true, if they really did need her. It made sense though. She was one of the Royal Four. They wouldn’t want the power of the granolith to fall into the wrong hands, therefore they needed a key: the Four. It made too much sense.

Tess Harding wanted to be needed about as much as she wanted to run.

Which left her with a dilemma.

Leave, and she never had to see Max again. Leave and she never got to see Max again. Maybe it would be better for all of them if she was out of the way…but maybe (as much as Tess hated to admit it) Liz was right, and it would be a betrayal. Could Tess risk betraying them all because she didn’t want to watch her boyfriend move on?

And then there was Isabel, and Michael, as close to family as she’d ever have. And Serena, the only human that she’d ever been able to open up with. And Kyle, who she had to admit was kinda cute in a midwestern way.

There was destiny, and enemies to fight, and maybe among those crystals was her mother too. Could she risk never being able to see that?

The park was quiet, completely still, and Tess had no tears left. Just silence, and confusion, and a decision to make. She couldn’t wait on this one. Couldn’t put it off until tomorrow. She had to know, so she could begin starting over. Wherever that would be.

Tess gazed up at the stars, the stars that frightened her in the marrow of her semi-human bones. They’d be the same if she went away, wherever she went. She couldn’t escape the stars. But she could make sure she spent a lot more nights like this, alone beneath an empty sky. She didn’t want that. As much as she needed to get away, to run from all the pain, she didn’t want to be alone.

And suddenly Tess found that she’d already made her decision.

There was a sound from the bushes, as if someone had whispered, "Thank you," but when Tess whirled around, there was no one there.

*

In the pre-dawn stillness, Liz woke up to warmth and cradling arms and smiled.

"I have to get home and change before class," she whispered into Max’s ear, pulling herself to a sitting position as he grumbled sleepily and tried to pull her back down.

His eyes finally opened, long-lashed and brilliant. "I love you," he murmured, gazing up at her. Liz paused, struck silent by the words, by the truth of where she was at that moment.

"Come on," she whispered, and pulled him out of bed.

A half hour later, she kissed him goodbye outside of her apartment, ran inside, keyed open the lock and tiptoed to her room just as the sun began to rise. There was no one there, but an envelope sat on her pillow, with her name on it. She slipped her bag off her shoulder, left it on the floor and settled on the bed like the breath of a ghost, barely touching anything.

There was a paper inside the envelop, a sheet of her stationary. He must have gotten it out of her desk. She unfolded it slowly and read:

Dear Liz,

If you’re reading this, I’m gone. Thank you. I cannot say that enough. Thank you. There are memories I would give anything to not have, and because of you, they’re gone now. Forever, I hope. I wish I could repay you, but nothing can ever repay what you have done for me, for everyone. My only hope is that when you’re an old woman, grey and stooped and still as beautiful as the day I healed you, you will look back on your life, and it will be beautiful. And I can only pray that I will be with you on that day, with my own beautiful memories, of you. The future is to be determined now.

Someone once said, "Destiny is not a matter of chance, it is a matter of choice. It is not a thing to be waited for, it is a thing to be achieved." You have achieved my destiny, this destiny. Without you, I would be nothing. Remember that, always. I hope this other Max…this other me…tells you every day how much I love you, but if I don’t, because it’s been a long day, or I think you already know…then never stop believing that is how I feel. I will always love you. In the life I led, the one constant was the pain of losing you and the hope that someday you might look at me with love again.

Choose your destiny, Liz. Choose the one that makes you happy,