My name is Michael.

I am an alien.

Not just any alien, Maria's alien.

That's right, I am a servant of Maria, goddess of all that is good and true.

She also supervises lust and love, in controlled doses.

I don't know when I joined.

According to the others I was left here on my fourth year.

I don't remember anything before my sixth year, so I suppose it's true. My parents were probably poor and didn't want to be lumbered with yet another son.

Sons are considered weak, and many families just drown them at birth. I suppose I was one of the lucky ones.

I live in the temple of Maria with three others.

Max is the goddess's favourite. He brings her gifts, and she in turn grants his every desire.

Alex is the goddess' counsellor. It is his job to listen to the holy one, and ensure the load on her mind is light. She pours her heart out to him, and in return Maria doesn't fry him for having naughty thoughts about her sister, Isabel, the goddess of everything beautiful and artificial.

Kyle is the goddess' lackey. He does everything in his power to ensure our mistress is comfortable and with plenty of food water and song. She works him to the bone, and in return, lets him have three nights off every month.

They are her favourites, and she goes everywhere with them. I on the other hand, am ignored.

Max says it is because I have spiky hair and the goddess likes smooth flat hair, but when I flattened it, the goddess tried to fry me in my sleep!

Kyle says it is because I'm too tall, and should be short like him. However, whenever I tried a spell to make myself become shorter, the goddess locks me in the golden cellars for weeks!

Alex just glares at me and tells me that he has to obey patient-doctor confidentiality.

I don't want to be ignored.

I want to be favoured too.

So I've formulated a plan.

I'm going to ask the Goddess Maria herself.

Now, if only I could remember the password to her heavenly chambers-

Hi, I'm Maria.

Ask one of my servants who I am, I'm sure they'll be extremely forthcoming.

I have them all extremely well trained.

All except that Alex boy- he has some rather disturbing dreams about my sister, but since he's my therapist I guess I have to deal.

Plus he knows my secrets- never a good omen when looking for replacement counsellors.

I have four of them you know.

All hand picked by my elder sister, Tess, to serve me with the utmost diligence.

Firstly there's Max.

Max is a good guy. Sweet, charming, and incredibly sweet- he gives me presents almost everyday!

Liz, my other sister, has a little crush on him.

I personally think he's too much of a suck up.

Then of course there's my little Kyley poo.

Kyle is incredible. He's a girl's dream come true.

I mean where else could you find a man smart enough to accessorise all your shoes under their matching handbags?

I love him really I do, and if he wasn't gay, I'd snatch him right up.

Tess always laughs when I say this, but it's true. Kyle is gay- he told me himself when I asked him if he wanted to be my Godly mate years ago.

You all know about Alex.

Finally there's Michael.

Not much to say.

Except I think I love him.

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